技巧05 如何設(shè)計(jì)句子-高一英語(yǔ)讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)基礎(chǔ)技巧與整體演練

高一英語(yǔ)讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)基礎(chǔ)技巧與整體演練技巧05如何設(shè)計(jì)句子讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)中的句子擴(kuò)展在讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)中，有的同學(xué)寫(xiě)的短句過(guò)多，內(nèi)容不具體，缺乏生動(dòng)性，導(dǎo)致詞數(shù)不夠。我們可以在簡(jiǎn)短句的基礎(chǔ)上恰當(dāng)添加定語(yǔ)、狀語(yǔ)等修飾成分或增加并列結(jié)構(gòu)等，擴(kuò)展句子，豐富內(nèi)容,使表達(dá)更具體、更形象。（一）利用同位語(yǔ)擴(kuò)充句子同位語(yǔ)主要使用名詞短語(yǔ)和同位語(yǔ)從句。例如：(2016年10月浙江卷)Shesawherhusband.她看到了她的丈夫。There,shesawherhusband,amanstaringather,wearinganexpressionofrelief.在那里，她看到了她的丈夫，一個(gè)正盯著她看的男人，帶著寬慰的表情?！痉治觥吭诰涫滋砑恿说攸c(diǎn)狀語(yǔ)There，在husband后面增加了同位語(yǔ)amanstaringather，其后還有一個(gè)分詞短語(yǔ)wearinganexpressionofrelief做狀語(yǔ)，補(bǔ)充說(shuō)明丈夫看著她時(shí)流露出來(lái)的表情。這種形象具體的描寫(xiě)，增加了畫(huà)面感，也提升了整個(gè)句子的層次。（二）利用狀語(yǔ)擴(kuò)充句子添加的狀語(yǔ)，可以是副詞、非謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞、介詞短語(yǔ)和狀語(yǔ)從句等。例如：(2016年10月浙江卷)Janewalkedon.簡(jiǎn)繼續(xù)走。Janewalkedonforquitealongtime.簡(jiǎn)繼續(xù)走了很長(zhǎng)時(shí)間。Withnopathtofollow,Janewalkedonforquitealongtime.因?yàn)闊o(wú)路可循，簡(jiǎn)繼續(xù)走了很長(zhǎng)時(shí)間。【分析】添加forquitealongtime和withnopathtofollow兩個(gè)做狀語(yǔ)的介詞短語(yǔ)后，句子表達(dá)更為生動(dòng)具體了。（三）利用定語(yǔ)擴(kuò)充句子定語(yǔ)擴(kuò)句的主要方式是使用形容詞、非謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞、介詞短語(yǔ)和定語(yǔ)從句等。例如：Hismotherworksinabigcompany.他母親在一家大公司工作。Hislovingmother,whousedtobeanexcellentEnglishteacherinamiddleschool,nowworksinabigcompany.他的慈母，曾經(jīng)是一名優(yōu)秀的中學(xué)英語(yǔ)老師，現(xiàn)在在一家大公司工作。【分析】我們?cè)谥髡Z(yǔ)mother前添加了形容詞loving，更形象地說(shuō)明了hismother的特征；在mother后面添加了whousedtobeanexcellentEnglishteacherinamiddleschool，內(nèi)容更豐富，讓讀者更加了解母親。（四）遞進(jìn)式擴(kuò)充句子對(duì)先后發(fā)生的兩個(gè)或多個(gè)連貫動(dòng)作，可以采用遞進(jìn)式。主要方式有(1)用and連接；(2)用afterthat,additionally,furthermore,what’smore,tomakethingsworse等。例如：Macthenjumpedoffthebicycle.然后麥克從自行車(chē)上跳了下來(lái)。Macthenjumpedoffthebicycleandhewasreadytofightagainstthewolf.麥克從自行車(chē)上跳下來(lái)，準(zhǔn)備跟狼搏斗?！痉治觥俊疤伦孕熊?chē)”與“準(zhǔn)備搏斗”兩個(gè)連貫動(dòng)作，讓Mac準(zhǔn)備跟狼搏斗的形象躍然紙上。（五）轉(zhuǎn)折式擴(kuò)充句子表示轉(zhuǎn)折的有but,however等。例如：Janekeptmoving.簡(jiǎn)繼續(xù)往前走。Janekeptmoving,butthefarthershewalked,themoreconfusedshebecame.簡(jiǎn)繼續(xù)往前走，但她走得越遠(yuǎn)，就越感到困惑?！痉治觥刻砑雍竺娴霓D(zhuǎn)折分句后，暗示著“她可能迷路了”。（六）因果式擴(kuò)充句子除了引導(dǎo)原因狀語(yǔ)從句和結(jié)果狀語(yǔ)從句的連詞后，還有dueto,owingto,onaccountof,becauseof,asaresultof等表示原因，therefore,asaresult等表示結(jié)果。例如：Hehasbrokenhisleg.他摔壞了腿。Hehasbrokenhislegandthereforehecan’twalk.他摔壞了腿，因此不能走路了。讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)中的句子壓縮雖然讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)的語(yǔ)料不同，但在續(xù)寫(xiě)的寫(xiě)作中，根據(jù)需要進(jìn)行語(yǔ)段壓縮的方法是可以通用的。常用的壓縮語(yǔ)段的方法有如下幾種：1.摘取法。找出語(yǔ)段材料的主旨句，直接摘取關(guān)鍵成分作為答案?；蛘邔⒎稚⒃诟骶渲械闹匾畔⒄页鰜?lái)，摘取關(guān)鍵詞語(yǔ)，再將其進(jìn)行連綴。2.概括法。沒(méi)有中心句，也沒(méi)有明顯關(guān)鍵詞的閱讀材料，如果要壓縮出主要內(nèi)容，則可以采用概括法，分別用一兩個(gè)恰當(dāng)?shù)脑~語(yǔ)去概括文句的意思，再組合答案。3.整合法。如果語(yǔ)段材料沒(méi)有中心句，其體現(xiàn)材料主旨的關(guān)鍵詞語(yǔ)可能分散在幾個(gè)句子中，這就需要考生將分散在各處的關(guān)鍵詞語(yǔ)找出來(lái)，將包含重要信息的句子加以綜合概括，然后將找出的關(guān)鍵詞與概括出來(lái)的內(nèi)容加以整合，形成符合題干要求的短句。4.替換法。閱讀材料中有能夠體現(xiàn)語(yǔ)段主旨的中心句，且中心句中有關(guān)鍵的詞語(yǔ)，這時(shí)候就可以運(yùn)用此法將指示代詞替換成語(yǔ)意明確的詞語(yǔ)。5.補(bǔ)充法。閱讀材料中有能夠體現(xiàn)語(yǔ)段主旨的中心句，但將其壓縮成主干后，還需要在中心詞前面補(bǔ)充出修飾、限制性的定語(yǔ)，才能讓句意完整明確，這時(shí)候就可以運(yùn)用補(bǔ)充法為主干中心詞補(bǔ)出修飾、限定性的詞語(yǔ)。1．閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫(xiě)兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。WhenIwas15,IfollowedRoytothedeepmountaininsearchofastragalusroot(黃芪),whichisarareandvaluableplant.Wesearchedtheplantforawholeday,butwithoutluck.Wefoundnothing.Asitgotdark,IaskedRoytogoback,butherefusedandsaid,“Iwouldrathersleeponthemountaintonightandcontinuetosearchtomorrow!”IdesiredtogohomebutIlackedthecouragetogobackalone,soIchosetostayandhelpRoyputupasimpletentunderatree.Itwasfreezingcoldonthemountainandtherewerescoresofmosquitoes,whichmadeitimpossibleforustohaveagoodsleep.What’sworse,weheardawolfhowlingnearby!Iwassoscared.“Iheardthatwolvesbully(欺負(fù))theweakandfearthestrong,”Roytoldme.“Let’sstriketheshovel(鏟子)andshouttoscareitaway!”Hefoundastoneandstartedtostriketheshovel.Andthenheshoutedashestrucktheshovel.Inspired,Ifollowedhimtoshoutloudly.Halfanhourlater,Ifeltcoldalloverthebody.Andthecoldaironthemountainmadethatworse.Mystomachbegantoache.Ilayinthetent,shivering,sweatingandthenfallingunconscious.Roywasshockedwithpanic.Hecalledmynamescreamingly,butIjustmadenoresponse.Hetriedtoputmeonhisbacktocarrymehomebutwithoutsuccess.Atlast,hewentoutandfoundsometreebranchesandblockeduptheentrancetoourtentwiththem.Then,herantothedirectionofourvillageasfastashecould.Notknowinghowmuchtimewentby,Iheardsomesoundsapproachingnear.IthoughtitwasRoybutIdidn’thearhimsayinganything.Inashock,Isatupwitharush.Atthatmoment,myeyeshadadjustedtothedarkness.Throughaholeofourtent,Isawtwoanimalslikedogsremovingthetreebrancheswiththeirmouthsandclaws.Theywerewolves!注意：1.續(xù)寫(xiě)詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右;2.請(qǐng)按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答.Paragraph1:Theirsuddenappearanceshockedmeandacoldsweatbrokeoutallovermybody.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2:Strangely,Isawthetwowolvesturnaroundandrunawayinaflash.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________2．閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫(xiě)兩段，使其構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。Havingworkedatasmallfoodstorefortwoyears,IthoughtIhadbecomesuccessfulatwhatourmanagercalled“customerrelations”.Ifirmlybelievedthatafriendlysmileandanautomatic“sir”,“madam”,“thankyou”and“sorry”wouldseemethroughanysituation.ButonaChristmasnightanoldwomanshookmybeliefthatsuchaglibresponse(巧言應(yīng)對(duì))couldsmoothoveranydifficultywhiledealingwithotherhumanbeings.Themomentsheenteredthestore,thewomanpresentedasharpcontrasttoourshinystorewithitsbrightlightingandneatlyarrangedshelves.Walkingasifeachstepwerepainful,sheslowlypushedopentheglassdoor.Onsuchazero-degreenight,shewaswearingonlyafadedprintdress,athinsweatertoosmalltobutton,andblackslipperswiththebackscutouttoexposeheels.Therewerenostockingsorsocksonherblue-veinedlegs.Afterwalkingaroundthestoreforseveralminutes,theoldwomanstoppedinfrontoftherowsofcannedvegetables.Shelookedattherowofcans,finallypickedupacanofcornandstaredatthelabel.Atthatpoint,Idecidedtobeagoodandpoliteemployeeandaskedherifsheneededhelp.AsIstoodclosetoher,mysmilebecamehardertomaintain.Anunpleasantsmellofsweatrosefromhertornclothing.“Ineedsomefood,”shemutteredinreplytomybright“Madam,canIhelpyou?”“Areyoulookingforcorn,madam?”“Ineedsomefood,”sherepeated,lookingdownatthecaninherhand,“Anykind.”“Well,thecanofcornisninety-fivecents,madam.”Isaidinmymosthelpfulvoice.“Orifyoulike,wehaveaspecialonbreadtoday.”Afterashortpause,sheliftedherheadandsaid,“ButIcan’tpay.”Forasecond,itwasonthetipofmytonguetotellherthatshecouldtakethecorn.注意：1.所續(xù)寫(xiě)短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；2.續(xù)寫(xiě)部分分為兩段，每段的開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)已為你寫(xiě)好Paragraph1：Thentheemployeerulesfloodedintomymind:remainpolitebutdonotletthecustomersgetthebestofyou.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2：Momentsaftersheleft,Irushedoutofthedoorwiththecanofcorn.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________3．閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫(xiě)兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。Acoupleofyearsago,justasIdoeverywinter,IbaggedupalltheitemsinmyclosetthatInolongerwore,alongwiththeclothingmysonshadoutgrown(長(zhǎng)得穿不下).Iissuedacalltoactiontoallofmyfamilyandfriends,askingthemtodothesame.Itisalwaysmyhopetore—purpose(重新利用)thosethingsthatdonothingmorethantakeupspaceinourhomes,thingsotherpeoplemightmakebetteruseof.Nothingbothersmemorethanselfishlysquirrelingthingsaway,thingsthatweknowwewillneveruseorwear,whilepeopleinourcommunitygowithout.Ifoundanuglypairofhand-knitted(手工編織)socksinoneofthebagsdonatedbyafriend.Nottobemean,buttheywereabadmixtureofcoloredyarn(紗線):orange,purple,yellowandblue.Ihadtodecide—garbageordonation?Itwasn’tliketheywereunusable.Theyweresimplyunpleasanttolookat,surelynotsomethinganyonewouldchoosetowear.Iimaginetheywereahomemadegiftgonebad.Iputtheuglysocksinthegarbage,buttenminuteslater,Itookthembackandputtheminthedonationpile.Laterthatafternoon,mymotherandIdrovedowntoMadisonAvenueindowntownPhoenix.EverywintersheandIloadupmyJeepwithourowncast-offs(自己不穿而贈(zèng)人的舊衣服)andthedonationsfromfriends,andwetakethemdowntown,alongwithfoodandwater,todistributetothemenandwomenlivingonthestreet.SometimesIevengetmyboysinvolved.Onthisparticularafternoon,asMomandIdistributedwarmclothingandhotfoodtoasmallcrowdofpeopleoutsidealocalhomelessshelter,Ireachedintothebagandpulledoutthelastofthedonations—theuglysocks.Surreptitiously(偷偷地),Iheldtheminmyhandasthecrowdofhomelessquietlyleft,eachwithagratefulsmile,afistfuloffoodandanarmloadofclothing.注意：1.續(xù)寫(xiě)詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右;2.請(qǐng)按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。JustasIwasabouttodropthesocksbackintotheemptybag,ateenageboycameuptome.___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________“Thesesocksareperfectforme!”hesmiled.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________4．閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫(xiě)兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。續(xù)寫(xiě)的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右。Onelong-agomorning,thehotsummersunclimbedtothetopofthesky.Bynoon,flowersdrooped(低垂).Birdsstoppedsinging.Lan,whowalkedtovisithergrandmotheronSundays,grewhotterandhotter.Asshepassed

an

enormous

house,she

spotted

abeautifultree.Itsbranchesspreadwide,andtheirleavescreatedashadyspacenexttotheroad.Lansatdowninthatshadetorest.Howniceandcool,shethought.Istillhavealongwalkaheadofme,butIcansithereforawhile.Lanwaswrong.Lessthanaminutelater,thedooroftheenormoushouseopenedwithabang.Aboyrushedoutandshouted,“Youcan’tsitthere!That’smytree!Chen’stree!”Heworesilktrousersandcarriedagoldentoypony.“Maybeit’syourtree,butyoudon’towntheshadebeneathit,”repliedLan.“Yes,Ido,”declaredChen．“Iowneverythingaboutthattree,eventhebirds!You’llhavetopaytositthere.”“Payyou?”criedLan.“Shadebelongstoeveryone.”“Notmyshade,”saidChen．“IfIbuyyourshade,mayIstophereonSundaysthissummer?”askedLan.“Isuppose,”saidChen．Lanreachedintohertwice-mendedpocketandhandedoverheronlycoin.“That’sallthemoneyIhave.”shesaid.“Fine!”saidChen.“Butremember,youboughttheshade.Nothingelse!”EverysummerSunday,LanstoppedtositinChen’sshadeonthewaytohergrandmother’s.Sheoftencalledtothebirdsinthetree.Thebirdswouldflydownandgatheraroundher.Aloneinhistoy-filledbedroom,ChenwatchedLantalkandlaughwiththebirds.She’stellingstories,hethought.Itlooksfun.ShouldIchargehermoremoneywhenshestayslonger?Thenherememberedshe’dhadonlyonecoininherpocket.However,whenautumnarrived,Lannolongerwalkedtohergrandmother’s.Chenmissedseeinghertalkingtothebirds._______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________OntheSundayLanappearedasexpected._______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________5．閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開(kāi)頭續(xù)寫(xiě)兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。WhenIwasinfifthgrade,youcouldhavetoldme,“Colin,it’snotcooltowearthesamepairofsweatpantseveryday,”ButIwascomfortable.Youcouldhavetoldme,“Colin,it’snotcooltogototheschooldanceanddotheMacarena(賽前舞).”lwouldnothavestopped.Youcouldhaveeventoldme,“Colin,it’snotcooltobeanactivememberofyourlocalchurch’sclownroadshow.”ThenIwenttosixthgrade,andallofasudden,therewereonlytwooptions.Icouldsomehowbecool,orIcouldsomehowbeinvisible.Iwasdoingprettywellatoptiontwountilthethirdperiodonthefirstday,whenourteacherMrs.Smithhadusfilloutaquestionnairewith“gettoknowyou”questions.Iassumedthatshewouldbereadingthemprivately.Solfeltsafetosharefromtheperspectiveofthesweatpants-wearing,Macarena-dancing,Christian-clowninglittlesnowflakethatIwas.Theteachercollectedthesheets,mixedthemup,andredistributedthemtotheclass.We’dreadthestudentsnameandourthreefavoriteanswers.Mysheetendedupinthehandsofakidwhowasoneofthecoolestandmeanest.His“favoriteanswers”ofminewerethethreeworstonestobereadoutloud.Thefirstquestionwas“What’syourfavoritemovie?”TheotherkidswroteScreamandUniversalSoldier.Hereadmyanswer,BeautyandtheBeast.Alaugheruptedfromtheroom,andmycheeksburned.Thenextquestionhereadwas“Wherewouldyouliketotravel?”Theothershadsaid“Australia”,“Japan”.Iwrote“whereverabooktakesme.”Thelaughterthistimehadanexplosiveequalitytoit.Thefinalquestionwas“Whatdoyouliketodoontheweekends?”Theotherkidswrote“hangoutwithfriends”and“gotothemall.”Iwrote“performwithClownsforChrist.”Thosewhoweren’tlaughingatmeweresortofstaringatmeindisgust.lfeltaboutaninchtall.lfixedmyeyesonthefloorandtriedtofigureoutifIcouldsomehowdisappear.注意:1.續(xù)寫(xiě)詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右;2.請(qǐng)按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。Butthen,somethingamazinghappened.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Ilookedatmyteacherwithgratitude.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________參考答案1.【參考范文】Paragraph1:Theirsuddenappearanceshockedmeandacoldsweatbrokeoutallovermybody.ButImanagedtogathermyselftogether.IstrucktheshovelleftbesidemewithastoneandscreamedasloudlyasIcould.Thetwowolveswerefrightenedatfirstandsteppedback.Butafterashorttimeofhesitation,theycontinuedtoremovethebranches.AndnomatterhowhardIstrucktheshovel,theyjustignored.Iwasindespair.ButIstillheldthestoneandshovelfirmly,thinkingIwouldn’tgiveitupwithoutafight.Paragraph2:Strangely,Isawthetwowolvesturnaroundandrunawayinaflash.“Aretheyafraidofmyshovel?”Iwondered.ButIrealizedIwaswrongwhenIsawmanyflashlightsapproachingmytentquickly.ItturnedoutthatRoyhadrunawaytoseekhelp.Withadozenofvillagers,Roywascomingtomyrescue!TheywerecallingmynameandIrespondedastheyremovedthebranches.AsRoygotintothetentandhuggedme,Icouldn’thelpcrying,bothinfrightandrelief.【寫(xiě)作指導(dǎo)】本篇讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)以人物為線索，主要講述了15歲那年，我跟隨羅伊來(lái)到深山尋找一種稀有且名貴的藥材黃芪根，但直到天黑也一無(wú)所獲，于是我們就在山上搭了帳篷，半夜，我胃疼并渾身發(fā)冷，于是羅伊便去了村子求救，我一個(gè)人在帳篷遭遇了狼群襲擊，千鈞一發(fā)之際，羅伊帶著村民趕了回來(lái)，救下了我。1.段落續(xù)寫(xiě)：

①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“它們的突然出現(xiàn)嚇了我一跳，渾身出了一身冷汗?！笨芍?，第一段可描寫(xiě)我是如何準(zhǔn)備奮力抵抗狼群的攻擊的，以及我害怕和絕望的心情。②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“奇怪的是，我看見(jiàn)那兩只狼轉(zhuǎn)頭就跑了?！笨芍诙慰删土_伊和村民們?nèi)绾渭皶r(shí)趕回帳篷并救下了我的。2.續(xù)寫(xiě)線索：狼群的出現(xiàn)讓我害怕——我敲打石頭恐嚇狼群無(wú)果——緊緊抓住鏟子，十分絕望——狼群退去——羅伊和村民們及時(shí)趕到——我如釋重負(fù)。3.詞匯激活行為類(lèi)①.拿起：hold/takeup/pickup②.擊打：strike/hit③.靠近：approach/getcloseto情緒類(lèi)①.絕望：indespair/desperate/hopeless②.害怕：infright/frightened/scared【典型句式】[高分句型1].AndnomatterhowhardIstrucktheshovel,theyjustignored.（運(yùn)用了nomatterhow引導(dǎo)的讓步狀語(yǔ)從句）[高分句型2].

ButIrealizedIwaswrongwhenIsawmanyflashlightsapproachingmytentquickly.（運(yùn)用了賓語(yǔ)從句以及when引導(dǎo)的時(shí)間狀語(yǔ)從句）2.【參考范文】Possibleversion1:Thentheemployeerulesfloodedintomymind:remainpolitebutdonotletthecustomersgetthebestofyou.Atthethoughtofthat,Imanagedafriendlysmileandautomaticallyblurtedout,“I’msorry,madam,butIcan’tgiveawayanythingforfree.”Hearingthis,theoldwomannoddedherhead,herfacedarkenedandeyelidsdropped.Unwillingly,sheputthecanbackontheshelf,shuffledpastmetowardthedoorandvanishedintothedistance.Itwasatthatmomentthatarippleofregretwelledupinsideme.HowIwishedIhadn’tsaidthosewords!(81words)Momentsaftersheleft,Irushedoutofthedoorwiththecanofcorn.Fortunately,thegauntfigureoftheoldwomanwasstillinsight,soIwentrunninguptoher.“Madam,MerryChristmas!”saidI,thrustingthecanofcornintoherhand.Forasecond,Icouldfeelthatherhandquivered.Withoutwaitingforherreply,Ijustwavedhergoodbyebeforetrottingstraightaway.Fortherestofmyshift,theimageofthewomanconstantlyremindedmethatwhiledealingwithotherhumanbeings,itwassincereconcernratherthanaglibresponsethatcouldsmoothoveranydifficulty.(92words)Possibleversion2:Thentheemployeerulesfloodedintomymind:remainpolite,butdonotletcustomersgetthebestofyou.Foramoment,Ievenentertainedtheideathatthiswassomesortoftest,andthatthiswomanwassomeonefromtheheadoffice,testingmyloyalty.Irespondeddutifully,“I’msorry,madam,butIcan’tgiveawayanythingforfree.”Theoldwoman’sfacecollapsedabitmoreandherhandstrembledassheputthecanbackontheshelf.Sheshuffledpastmetowardthedoor,hertornanddirtyclothingbarelycoveringherbentback.(80words)Momentsaftersheleft,Irushedoutthedoorwiththecanofcorn.Butshewasnowhereinsight.WhileIwasdraggingmyselfback,whatkeptmecompanywasmerelybitingwind.Fortherestofmyshift,theimageofthewomanhauntedme.Iwassoyoung,healthyandsmugwhileshewassoold,sickanddesperate.WishingwithallmyheartthatIhadactedlikeahumanbeingratherthansomercilessanemployee,Iwassaddenedtorealizewhenfacingdilemmashowdifficultitwasforahearttostaygold.(85words)【寫(xiě)作指導(dǎo)】本文以人物為線索展開(kāi)，講述了作者在一家小食品店工作了兩年之后，在一個(gè)圣誕夜，一位老婦人動(dòng)搖了作者的信念，讓作者不相信這種油嘴滑舌的回應(yīng)可以解決與他人打交道時(shí)的任何困難。1.段落續(xù)寫(xiě)①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“然后，我的腦海中浮現(xiàn)出了員工守則：保持禮貌，但不要讓顧客占你的便宜?！笨芍?，第一段描寫(xiě)作者按照員工守則，拒絕提供免費(fèi)的食物，老婦人失望地離開(kāi)了，而作者感到了后悔。②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“她走后不久，我拿著玉米罐沖出了門(mén)?！笨芍?，第二段可描寫(xiě)作者給老婦人送去玉米罐頭，她很感激，而作者也感悟了在與他人打交道時(shí)，應(yīng)是真誠(chéng)的關(guān)心，而不是能化解任何困難的油嘴滑舌的回應(yīng)。2.續(xù)寫(xiě)線索：拒絕老婦人—后悔—追上老婦人—老婦人感激—獲得感悟3.詞匯激活行為類(lèi)變黑：darken/blacken/dim消失：vanish/disappear追上：runupto/catchupwith猛塞：thrust/plug情緒類(lèi)不情愿地：unwillingly/reluctantly/grudgingly后悔：regret/repentance【典型句式】[高分句型1]Itwasatthatmomentthatarippleofregretwelledupinsideme.(強(qiáng)調(diào)句型)[高分句型2]Fortherestofmyshift,theimageofthewomanconstantlyremindedmethatwhiledealingwithotherhumanbeings,itwassincereconcernratherthanaglibresponsethatcouldsmoothoveranydifficulty.(that引導(dǎo)的賓語(yǔ)從句和強(qiáng)調(diào)句型)3.【參考范文】JustasIwasabouttodropthesocksbackintotheemptybag,ateenageboycameuptome.“CanIpleasehavethosesocks?”heasked,hisblueeyessparklinginthesun.Iwassurprisedhandinghimthesocks.“Thankyousomuch,Ma’am!”hegrinned.“Thesesocksremindmeofmygrandmother.Sheusedtoknitstufflikethisforme!”TheyoungmanracedtothesidewalkcheerfullyasifIhadgivenhimabrandnewcaroramillionbucks.Hesatdown,slippedintothesocks,stoodupandstompedhisfeet.“They’reperfect!”hesmiled.Iwasdeeplytouchedbyhisinnocentsmile.Thosesocksnotonlywarmedhisfeetthatday,butsowashisheart—andmine.Theyhadrekindledthememoryofthatyoungman’sgrandmother,awomanwhomusthavelovedhimdearly.Ihadeverbeensothoughtlessastothinkthatthosesocks,aspitifulastheyappearedonthesurface,didn’thaveapurpose.Tothisday,it’sproofthatthereishappinessinlife’ssimplestthings,andwe’llneverknowhowmuchuntilwe’vesharedthosethingswithothers.(165words)【寫(xiě)作指導(dǎo)】本文以人物為線索展開(kāi)，講述了作者發(fā)起了一項(xiàng)回收舊衣并贈(zèng)送給有需要的人的活動(dòng)。一次，作者發(fā)現(xiàn)了一雙難看的手工編織的襪子，作者本打算扔掉，想了想又留了下來(lái)。在作者分發(fā)舊衣服的時(shí)候，作者本以為這雙襪子送不掉了，這時(shí)一個(gè)男孩卻對(duì)這雙襪子很有興趣。1.段落續(xù)寫(xiě)：①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“正當(dāng)我準(zhǔn)備把襪子放回空袋子時(shí)，一個(gè)十幾歲的男孩向我走來(lái)?！币约暗诙问拙鋬?nèi)容““它們是完美的！”他笑了。”可知，第一段可描寫(xiě)小男孩為什么想得到這雙襪子。②由第二段首句內(nèi)容““它們是完美的！”他笑著說(shuō)?！笨芍?，第二段可描寫(xiě)男孩的話讓作者產(chǎn)生的一些感悟。2.續(xù)寫(xiě)線索：收集衣物——發(fā)現(xiàn)難看的襪子——扔掉又撿回來(lái)——贈(zèng)送舊衣物——男孩想要襪子——作者感悟3.詞匯激活行為類(lèi)①使感動(dòng)：touch/move②使回憶起：rekindle/bringback③快跑：race/runquickly情緒類(lèi)①驚訝的：surprised/amazed②開(kāi)心地：cheerfully/happily/merrily/gladly【典型句式】【高分句型1】Theyhadrekindledthememoryofthatyoungman’sgrandmother,awomanwhomusthavelovedhimdearly.（運(yùn)用了who引導(dǎo)的限制性定語(yǔ)從句）【高分句型2】Tothisday,it’sproofthatthereishappinessinlife’ssimplestthings,andwe’llneverknowhowmuchuntilwe’vesharedthosethingswithothers.（運(yùn)用了that引導(dǎo)的名詞性從句和until引導(dǎo)的時(shí)間狀語(yǔ)從句）4.【參考范文】

Chenmissedseeinghertalkingtothebirds.Weekafterweek,Chenplayedaloneinhistoy-filledroom.ThepictureofLan’schattingwithbirdscametohismindagain.LookingatLan’scoin,Chenwonderedwhattodoifshecamebacktositinhisshade.Shouldhechargeheragain,orshouldhegivethecoinback?Manymonthslater,thesummersunreturned,hotasever.ChenstoodbyhiswindoweachSunday,lookingforwardtoLan’scomingagain.OntheSundayLanappearedasexpected.Atthesightofher,Chenracedoutside.Withouthesitation,hereachedintohispocket,pulledoutLan’scoin，andhandeditback．“I’msorry,”hesaid.“Youdidn’tneedtopayme.”Lanwastoosurprisedtobelieveit,sosheaskedindoubt,“Thissummer,yourshadebelongstoeveryone?”“Yes,”repliedChen.“