專題02讀后續(xù)寫語篇的連貫性(教師版)

專題02參考答案課中講解sectiononecontentcoherence1.Thewritingintentionofthecontinuationpartshouldbeconsistentwiththatofthewritingmaterials.2.Theimportanceofthecohesionbetweenthegivensentenceofeachparagraphandthecontinuationpartshouldbeattached.3.Thecohesionbetweenthetwocontinuationparagraphsshouldalsobepaidattentionto.教師版標注：1.故事大意一致，寫作意圖一致2.段落語句與續(xù)寫內容的銜接3.兩個段落之間的銜接e.g.Almostwithoutthinking,Ibentandgaveherahug.Sheheldontometightly.Beforethewomanleft,Isaidtoher,“Mymothertreated

everyonekindly,sheisagreatperson,butshepassedawayyearsago.youarelikemymother,”thewomansaid,“thankyou.Ifyouwanttovisitme,I’lltellyoumystory.”Thenthewomanleft.

Afteralongpause,I

drovethetaxi

togohome.Thenextday,Iwas

onmyway

tovisither.

Theoldwomantoldmethatsheusedtobeamillionaire.Shebecameimmersedinmakingmoney.Shewastheownerofa

particularbuilding

wesawlastnight.Butsheneglectedher

family.heronlysondiedoneyearagobecauseofcancer.Shesoldeverythingtosavehim,butfailed.Howsad!Atlast,theoldwomansaidtome,“Lifeisshort,butpleasebe

innohurry.

Thougheveryonehastoearnmoneyto

makealiving,alwaysrememberthatfamilyisthemostimportantthingtoyou,”I

saidnothing

butnoddedhard.

1.Thethemeofthecontinuationpart,whichistreasuringyourfamily,correspondtothatofthewritingmaterials.Inaddition,theplotinthesecondparagraphcentersaroundthekeyword“particularbuilding”,aclueinthematerialthatisonlybrieflymentionedandneedsfurtherexplanation.2.Thegivensentencesarewellconnectedwiththecontinuationpart.Forexample,inparagraphone,thegivensentence“Almostwithoutthinking,Ibentandgaveherahug.”isfollowedby“Sheheldontometightly.”“Hug”and“holdontome”showsthecohesionbetweenactions.3.Infirstparagraph,“I’lltellyoumystory”isasuspenseplacedbythewriter,whichiswellexplainedbytheplotafterthesentence“Theoldwomantoldmethatsheusedtobeamillionaire”.inthesecondparagraph.教師版標注：1.續(xù)寫部分關于珍惜親人的主題和原材料相符，并且填補了材料中關于“particularbuilding”這個線索所可能引發(fā)的劇情。2.第一段的段首語句與后續(xù)的內容的聯(lián)系非常的緊密。例如第一段的前兩句剛好是一個流暢的動作銜接。3.第一段中埋下的線索I’lltellyoumystory，在第二段中Theoldwomantoldmethatsheusedtobeamillionaire剛好是一種內容的銜接。sectiontwosentencecoherence強調still,indeed,apparently,oddlyenough,ofcourse,afterall,significantly,interestingly,also,aboveall,surely,certainly,undoubtedly,inanycase,anyway,aboveall,infact,especially,obviously,clearly比較like,similarly,likewise,inthesameway,inthesamemanner,equally對比bycontrast,onthecontrary,while,whereas,ontheotherhand,unlike,instead,but,conversely,differentfrom,however,nevertheless,otherwise,whereas,unlike,yet,incontrast列舉forexample,forinstance,suchas,take...forexample,except(for),toillustrate時間later,next,then,finally,atlast,eventually,meanwhile,fromnowon,atthesametime,forthetimebeing,intheend,immediately,inthemeantime,inthemeanwhile,recently,soon,nowandthen,during,nowadays,since,lately,assoonas,afterwards,temporarily,earlier,now,afterawhile順序first,second,third,then,finally,tobeginwith,firstofall,inthefirstplace,last,next,aboveall,lastbutnottheleast,firstandmostimportant可能probably,perhaps解釋inotherwords,infact,asamatteroffact,thatis,namely,insimplerterms遞進Whatismore,inaddition,and,besides,also,furthermore,too,moreover,furthermore,aswellas,additionally,again讓步although,afterall,inspiteof...,despite,evenif,eventhough,though,admittedly,whatevermayhappen轉折however,ratherthan,insteadof,but,yet,ontheotherhand,unfortunately,whereas原因forthisreason,dueto,thanksto,because,becauseof,as,since,owingto結果asaresult,thus,hence,so,therefore,accordingly,consequently,asaconsequence總結onthewhole,inconclusion,inaword,tosumup,inbrief,insummary,toconclude,tosummarize,inshort.其他mostly,occasionally,currently,naturally,mainly,exactly,evidently,frankly,monly,forthispurpose,toalargeextent,formostofus,inmanycases,inthiscasesectionthreelanguagecoherenceThelanguagecoherenceisshowinthefouraspects:word,sentence,grammarandfiguresofspeech.e.g.OneweekendinJuly,Janeandherhusband,Tom,haddriventhreehourstocampovernightbyalakeintheforest.Unfortunately,onthewayanunpleasantsubjectcameupandtheystartedtoquarrel.Bythetimetheyreachedthelake,JanewassoangrythatshesaidtoTom,“I’mgoingtofindabetterspotforustocamp”andwalkedaway.Withnopathtofollow,Janejustwalkedonforquitealongtime.Aftershehadclimbedtoahighplace,sheturnedaround,hopingtoseethelake.Tohersurprise,shesawnothingbutforestand,farbeyond,asnowcappedmountaintop.Shesuddenlyrealizedthatshewaslost.“Tom!”shecried.“Help!”Noreply.IfonlyshehadnotlefthermobilephoneinthatbagwithTom.Janekeptmoving,butthefarthershewalked,themoreconfusedshebecame.Asnightwasbeginningtofall,Janewassotiredthatshehadtostopforthenight.Lyingawakeinthedark,JanewantedverymuchtobewithTomandherfamily.Shewantedtoholdhimandtellhimhowmuchshelovedhim.Janeroseatthebreakofday,hungryandthirsty.Shecouldhearwatertrickling(滴落)somewhereatadistance.Quicklyshefollowedthesoundtoastream.Tohergreatjoy,shealsosawsomeberrybushes.Shedrankandateafewberries.Neverinherlifehadshetastedanythingbetter.Feelingstrongernow,Janebegantowalkalongthestreamandhopeitwouldleadhertothelake.Asshepickedherwaycarefullyalongthestream,Janeheardahelicopter.Isthatforme?Unfortunately,thetreesmadeitimpossibleforpeopletoseeherfromabove.Afewminuteslater,anotherhelicopterflewoverhead.Janetookoffheryellowblouse,thinkingthatsheshouldgotoanopenareaandflagthemiftheycamebackagain.Butnomorehelicoptercameanditwasgettingdarkagain.Amidthedreadfuldarkness,strangesoundsofwildbeastswereheard.“Ifitweren'tforthatstupidquarrel,Iwouldn'tbetrappedhere,”shethoughttoherself,regretfultearscloudinghereyes.Surroundedbythefearandtiredness,Janefeltexhaustedandfinallyslidintosleep.“Tom,isthatyou?“shemurmured.“Tom,help!”Inherdream,shesawamanextendinghisarmstowardsheratadistance.ItwasdaybreakwhenJanewokeup.Afterawashing,Janecontinuedtoforceherwayahead.Intheboundlesssearch,shefounditimpossibletofindawayout,whichthrewherintodesperation.Fortunately,ahelicopterflewoverheadjustatthatmoment.InnotimedidJanerushtotherockandclimbontoit.Shewavedheryellowblousemadlytothepassinghelicopter.Tohergreatjoy,thistime,thehelicopterspottedher.ThemomentJanewasreunitedwithherhusband,hertearscloudedhervision.Theyhuggedeachothertightlyinthewarmlightofthesettingsun.Whatdothetwoarticleshaveinmonconcerningwords,sentencesandgrammar?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________教師版：詳細見圖詞匯上：原材料和續(xù)寫部分都使用了很多短動作動詞，且數(shù)量較多句子上：非謂語，倒裝句語法上：虛擬語氣原材料：sectionfourstructurecoherenceThestructurecoherencecanbeshownintheechobetweenparagraphs,orbetweencontinuationpartandthetheme,etc.e.g.Butnomorehelicoptercameanditwasgettingdarkagain.Amidthedreadfuldarkness,strangesoundsofwildbeastswereheard.“Ifitweren'tforthatstupidquarrel,Iwouldn'tbetrappedhere,”shethoughttoherself,regretfultearscloudinghereyes.Surroundedbythefearandtiredness,Janefeltexhaustedandfinallyslidintosleep.“Tom,isthatyou?“shemurmured.“Tom,help!”Inherdream,shesawamanextendinghisarmstowardsheratadistance.ItwasdaybreakwhenJanewokeup.Afterawashing,Janecontinuedtoforceherwayahead.Intheboundlesssearch,shefounditimpossibletofindawayout,whichthrewherintodesperation.Fortunately,ahelicopterflewoverheadjustatthatmoment.InnotimedidJanerushtotherockandclimbontoit.Shewavedheryellowblousemadlytothepassinghelicopter.Tohergreatjoy,thistime,thehelicopterspottedher.ThemomentJanewasreunitedwithherhusband,hertearscloudedhervision.Theyhuggedeachothertightlyinthewarmlightofthesettingsun.教師版引導語：注意這里標黃的兩句，這里續(xù)寫通過兩句相似的內容，中心動詞都是cloud，進行了一個內容上的呼應，但是雖然都是淚水充滿了眼睛，但是兩句話的感情剛好是相反的e.g.Ihadaninterestingchildhood.Itwasfilledwithsurpriseandamusement,allbecauseofmymotherloving,sweet,yetabsentmindedandforgetful.OnestrangefamilytripwetookwhenIwaseleventellsalotabouther.MytwosetsofgrandparentslivedinColoradoandNorthDakota,andmyparentsdecidedtospendafewweeksdrivingtothosestatesandseeingallthesightsalongtheway.Asthefirstdayofourtripapproached,David,myeightyearoldbrother,andIunwillinglysaidgoodbyetoallofourfriends.Whoknewifwewouldeverseethemagain?Finally,themomentofourdeparturearrived,andweloadedsuitcases,books,games,campingequipment,andatentintothecarandbravelydroveoff.Webravelydroveoffagaintwohourslaterafterwe’dreturnedhometogetthepurseandtraveler’schecksMomhadforgotten.DavidandIwerealwaysalittlenervouswhenusinggasstationbathroomifMomwasdrivingwhileDadslept:“Youstandoutsidethedoorandplaylookout（放哨）whileIgo,andI’llstandoutsidethedoorandplaylookoutwhileyougo.”Ihadterriblepicturesinmymind:“Honey,wherearethekids?”“What?!Oh,Gosh…Ithoughttheywerebeingawfullyquite.”Wewereneveractuallyleftinastrangecity,butwewerenotabouttotakeanychance.Onthefourthorfifthnight,wehadtroublefindingahotelwithavacancy.Afterdrivinginvainforsometime,Momsuddenlygotagreatidea:Whydidn’twefindahousewithalikelylookingbackyardandaskifwecouldsetuptentthere?DavidandIbecamenervous.Toourgreatrelief,Dadturneddowntheidea.Momnevercouldunderstandourobjections(反對).Ifastrangefamilyshoweduponherfrontdoorstep,Momwouldhavebeendelighted.Shethinkseveryoneintheworldisasniceassheis.Wefinallyfoundavacancyinthenexttown.Paragraph1:Thenextdaywerememberedthebrandnewtentwehadbroughtwithus.Paragraph2:Wedrovethroughseveralstatesandsawlotsofgreatsightsalongtheway.學生習作：Thenextdaywerememberthebrannewtentwehadbroughtwithus.“We’renotgoingtostayinhotelsanymore.”Momsuddenlysaid,withafirmtone,“Orourtentwouldbeofnouse.”Withallourobjectionsinvain,wefinallystoppedonthefrontdoorstepofahousewithabigbackyard.Tooursurprise,itwasamuchbetterexperiencethanwehadimagined.DavidandIhadagreattimetrying.Allthecampingequipmentandmomwaschattinghappilywiththekindfamily.Thoughwedidn’thavethetoolsforcookingsincemomissoforgetful.Westillhaveagoodmealastheretrulywassomeonewhowasasniceasmomwas.教師版標注：本段寫作把mother這個人物置于前景，通過這一具有，典型特征的人物串聯(lián)全文的中心思想。因為這則故事的標題適合健忘而善良的媽媽的一次旅行。需續(xù)寫部分，第1段句首說到我們記起了帳篷，那么可以圍繞帳篷展開段落，可以體現(xiàn)母親的健忘，也突出母親所期盼的善良，來講述一些比較有趣的事。而且這段的結尾部分thoughwedidn'thavethetoolsforcookingsincemomissoforgetful，westillhaveagoodmeal。Astheretrulywassomeonewhowasasniceasmomwas.用來解釋前半句，更重要的是和所給短文的最后一段，ifastrangefamilyshoweduponherfrontdoorstepmomwouldhavebeendelighted。Shethinkseveryoneintheworldisasniceassheis形成了強烈的呼應。Wedrovethroughseveralstatesandsawlotsofgreatsightsalongtheway.Withournosepressedhardagainstthewindowandeyesgluedtothewindingroadahead,DavidandIanticipatedeverydayforathrillingadventure