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MBA優(yōu)秀statementofpurpose范文評析留學(xué)生論文網(wǎng)MBA優(yōu)秀statementofpurpose范文評析【W(wǎng)riteacandiddescriptionofyourself,stressingthosepersonalqualities,assets,andliabilitiesthatyoufeelwillinfluenceyourgraduatework.Describewhatyouconsidertobeyourmostimportantprofessionaland/oracademicachievementtodate.】Ifoneweretoaskmyfriendstodescribemetheywoulddescribemeasaverypleasant,diverse,activeandintelligentwoman.IthinkoneofmymostdistinguishingcharacteristicsisthediversityofexperiencesIpossess.Iamasciencestudentwithaflairforthearts.Iamawomanwithtechnicalaptitudeandaninterestinmanagement.Ialsohaveapassionfortravelingandunderstandingdifferentculturesoftheworld.Alltheseelementshavegivenmeaverybroadoutlook,withvaryingdegreesofknowledgeinarangeoftopics.Istronglybelievethatalthoughsomearenotrelateddirectly,allthesequalitieswillinfluencemygraduatework.【點(diǎn)評:】開頭段落撰寫非常不錯(cuò)。作者在開頭部分對后續(xù)段落的內(nèi)容進(jìn)行簡要概括,同時(shí)有助于吸引讀者注意力-----激發(fā)了讀者好奇心,并使得讀者想繼續(xù)閱讀下去。MyEngineeringdegreehasgivenastrongfoundationtomyanalyticalskillssincecivildesigninginvolvesalotoflong,complexandintricatecalculationsandtheapplicationofbasicmathskills.Overthepastfouryears,Ihavebeenworkingpart-timewithmyfamilyfirm,SnMTechSystems.Iamalsotheco-founderandactivememberwithFOE-FriendsoftheEnvironment.IhaveassistedintheinstallationofEnterprise-wideResourcePlanning(ERP)SystematBlotech,amajorEngineeringCompany.MorethanwhatIhavestudiedinschoolandcollege,ithasbeentheseexperiencesthathaveshapedthepersonthatIamtoday.【點(diǎn)評:】這段中,作者按照diversity這個(gè)線索進(jìn)行展開。論述中提到的一些方面比如很強(qiáng)的分析能力,數(shù)學(xué)技能以及工作經(jīng)驗(yàn),這些點(diǎn)對攻讀MBA非常重要的。作者在這段中說到自己在獲得學(xué)位過程中,沒有浪費(fèi)任何時(shí)間,而是不斷積累工作經(jīng)驗(yàn)。段落中談到的做自愿者的經(jīng)歷對于申請MBA來說也是非常有優(yōu)勢,因?yàn)榇髮W(xué)院校都喜歡有社會(huì)責(zé)任心的學(xué)生。所以當(dāng)你寫自己經(jīng)歷的時(shí)候必須要真實(shí)----在侃侃而談之前,確保你有真實(shí)的例子支撐,比如自愿者工作或其他社會(huì)工作,這樣敘述將大大增加可信度。作者最后一句對整段做了總結(jié)。Ibelievethatthisuniqueblendofexperienceshasmademeawomanwithanoriginalpointofview.Thisblendhasgivenmeabroaderperspectivetoandagoodunderstandingoflifeandagoaltoaimfor.Amongotherthings,IhavethisdiversityofexperiencetoofferUtahUniversity.MymostsubstantialaccomplishmenthasbeenthesuccessofthesoftwareupgradationprojectthatImanagedatSnMTechSystemsPvt.Ltd.,NewDelhi,whereIhavebeenworkingasaparttimeAssociateIntern-ManagementInformationSystemssince1994.【點(diǎn)評:】現(xiàn)在我們談?wù)劦谌巍W髡甙凑誨iversity這個(gè)線索來安排文章內(nèi)容是不錯(cuò)的?!癆mongotherthings,IhavethisdiversityofexperiencetoofferUtahUniversity”這段作者暗示限于篇幅從這些經(jīng)歷中獲得很多無形財(cái)富無法展開敘述。緊接著作者談'mostimportantachievement'略顯有點(diǎn)唐突。DuringthefirsttwoyearsofmyworkatSnMTech,Ihadanopportunitytoobserveandworkwiththeexistingsystembeingused.Someofthesoftwarepackagesbeingusedwereoutdatedversions.IhavealwaysbeenintouchwiththelatestsoftwarepackagesthankstothepowerfulPCIhaveathomeandamquiteusedtoworkingwithaGraphicalUserInterface(GUI)environment.Attheoffice,therewasgreatdealofchaoswhilepreparingreportsthatinvolveduseofmorethanonesoftwaresincecompatibilitybetweenpackagesusuallyposedaproblem.Thedifficultywefacedputtingdifferentfilestogetherledtothefinalreportappearingratherhaphazardsometimes.【點(diǎn)評:】第四段作者表面上是介紹作者自己處理一個(gè)難題,實(shí)際上說明兩點(diǎn):1.她一直在家族企業(yè)從事基礎(chǔ)工作,并且不斷需求工作上的改進(jìn);2.她對常見的軟件很熟悉,同時(shí)計(jì)算機(jī)技能熟練。Ibelieveinprovidingandmaintainingnon-negotiablehighstandardsandservice.IrecognizedthatshiftingtoanewerGUIbasedsoftwarewouldnotonlydramaticallyimproveourdocumentationquality,butalsoincreaseproductivityattheworkplace.Presentingtheprosandconstothemanagementoftheupgradationwasaverychallengingtask.Iwasaskedtoprepareaproposalregardingtheupgradationofthefirm'ssoftware.Initially,Iimaginedthisprojectwouldberathersimplebutitturnedouttobeamongthemostchallengingandrewardingexperiencesofmylife.【點(diǎn)評:】第五段第一句咋一看給人感覺作者有點(diǎn)高傲自大,但是當(dāng)你閱讀完整段時(shí)候,就能看出作者真摯之心。Throughafirm-widesurveyofoperatorsandseveralone-on-onediscussionsoftheirownpreferencesandsolutions,Ifoundthatwhileeverybodywantedanupgradation,theyhaddoubtssincetheywouldhavetolearnawholesetofnewskills.Inordertoprepareabudget,Iprocuredquotationsfromvariousvendorsandanalyzedpossiblecombinations.IrealizedthenecessityofatrainingcoursefortheoperatorsbecausemostofthemwerenotfamiliarwiththeGUIinterface.Iexaminedthevarioustrainingclassesthatofferedprivatein-housetrainingfortheemployees.Afteradetailedanalysis,Ipresentedmyreport

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