外貌天生有各種殘缺的孩子 也等到了改變她一生的那句話

外貌天生有各種殘缺的孩子也等到了改變她一生的那句話33TheWhisperTest耳語測試IgrewupknowingIwasdifferent,andIhatedit.Iwasbornwithacleftpalate,andwhenIstartedtogotoschool,myclassmates—whowereconstantlyteasing—madeitcleartomehowImustlooktoothers:alittlegirlwithamisshapenlip,crookednose,lopsidedteeth,andhollowandsomewhatgarbledspeech.Icouldn"tevenblowupaballoonwithoutholdingmynose,andwhenIbenttodrinkfromafountain,thewaterspilledoutofmynose.成長的過程中，我一直知道自己和別人不一樣，我討厭這樣。我天生唇腭裂，上學(xué)后，那些時常取笑我的同學(xué)們讓我清楚地看到了別人眼中的自己：一個嘴唇畸形、鼻子扭曲、牙齒歪斜、講話漏風(fēng)且有些含糊不清的小女孩。要是不捏住鼻子，我甚至連只氣球都吹不起來。當(dāng)我俯身從噴嘴式飲水器喝水時，水會從我的鼻孔里漏出來。Whenmyschoolmatesasked,"Whathappenedtoyourlip?"I"dtellthemthatI"dfallenasababyandcutitonapieceofglass.Somehowitseemedmoreacceptabletohavesufferedanaccidentthantohavebeenborndifferent.BytheageofsevenIwasconvincedthatnooneoutsidemyownfamilycouldeverloveme,orevenlikeme.當(dāng)同學(xué)們問起“你的嘴唇怎么啦？”我會告訴他們我嬰兒時摔了一跤，嘴唇被玻璃片給割豁了。說因意外所致似乎比說先天異樣更容易被人接受。到了七歲，我已經(jīng)深信，出了家門沒有一個人會愛我，甚至都不會喜歡我。AndthenIenteredthesecondgrade,andMrs.Leonard"sclass.Shewasroundandprettyandfragrant,withshiningbrownhairandwarmdarkeyesthatsmiledevenontherareoccasionswhenhermouthdidn"t.Everyoneadoredher.ButnoonecametolovehermorethanIdid.后來我升入二年級，進(jìn)了倫納德夫人的班。她身材豐滿，長相靚麗，渾身散發(fā)著芳香，還有著一頭亮澤的棕發(fā)和一雙熱情的黑眼睛。即便是偶爾嘴上不笑的時候，她那雙眼睛里也會流露出微笑。每個人都喜歡她，但沒人比我更愛她。Thetimecamefortheannual"hearingtests"givenatourschool.Iwasbarelyabletohearanythingoutofoneear,andwasnotabouttorevealyetanotherproblemthatwouldsinglemeoutasdifferent.AndsoIcheated.Ihadlearnedtowatchotherchildrenandraisedmyhandwhentheydidduringgrouptesting.The"whispertest"however,requiredadifferentkindofdeception:Eachchildwouldgotothedooroftheclassroom,turnsideways,closeoneearwithafinger,andtheteacherwouldwhispersomethingfromherdesk,whichthechildwouldrepeat.Thenthesamethingwasdonefortheotherear.Ihaddiscoveredinkindergartenthatnobodycheckedtoseehowtightlytheuntestedearwasbeingcovered,soImerelypretendedtoblockmine.Asusual,Iwaslast,butallthroughthetestingIwonderedwhatMrs.Leonardmightsaytome.Iknewfrompreviousyearsthatshewhisperedthingslike"Theskyisblue"or"Doyouhavenewshoes?"學(xué)校一年一度的“耳語測試”時間到了。我有一只耳朵幾乎聽不見任何聲音，但我不打算暴露又一個會使自己被歸為異類的問題。所以我作弊了。在集體測試中，我學(xué)會了觀察其他孩子的動作，當(dāng)他們舉手時，我也跟著舉起手。然而“耳語測試”卻需要另一種完全不同的騙術(shù)：每個孩子都要走到教室門口，側(cè)過身，用手指堵住一只耳朵，然后老師在她桌子的位置輕聲細(xì)語，再讓孩子復(fù)述。另一只耳朵也要同樣來一遍。早在上幼兒園的時候，我就發(fā)現(xiàn)其實沒有人會檢查你該捂住的那只耳朵捂得有多嚴(yán)實，因此我只是假裝堵住了自己的耳朵。和往常一樣，我是最后一個。但在整個測試期間我都在琢磨倫納德夫人可能會對我說些什么。我打探到前幾年她低語的都是“天空是藍(lán)色的”或者“你有新鞋子么？”之類的話。Myturncameup.Iturnedmybadeartoherplugginguptheothersolidlywithmyfinger,thengentlybackedmyfingeroutenoughtobeabletohear.Iwaitedandthenheardthewordsthatchangedmylifeforever.Mrs.Leonard,thepretty,fragrantteacherIadored,saidsoftly,"Iwishyouwere