Jane六年級下冊各單元作文范例及點評

1、優(yōu)樂普外語學校六年級下冊各單元作文范例及點評姓名： 指導老師：JaneMy friend and I    Ive got a lovely friend at school. His name is Jack. Jack is 12 years old now. Im 11. Hes older than me. Hes 150 cm tall. Im 148 cm. Hes taller and stronger. Hes 43 kg and Im 41 kg. Hes heavier. Weve got round faces and short hair.

2、 But my eyes are bigger and my legs are longer. Our favourite colours are white and blue. We like summer best. We both like sports, too. On Saturdays, we play table tennis. On Sundays, we play basketball. Hes good at basketball. But I do better at table tennis. We laugh and play together. How happy

3、we are!【要領點評】寫法：這篇作文的題目是“我的朋友和我”。既然寫作范圍是兩個人物，就要筆墨均勻，兩者缺一不可。不能只描寫朋友，也不能只敘述我。這無形中增加了寫作的難度。解決這個難點的關鍵是：找出兩個人幾方面的異同。可以通過常見的年齡、身高、體重、外貌、喜好等方面列舉出每個人的具體實際情況，再進行比較，通過比較突出每個人物的特點。這樣就把人物活靈活現的展現給讀者了。時態(tài)：像此類題目的作文，運用一般現在時即可。句型：因為涉及兩個人的比較，不要忘記使用比較級句型：A+be+比較級+than+B。注意：在列舉兩個人的“體貌、喜好”等方面情況時，應一邊列舉，一邊比較。不要一味指出不同，還要列舉相

4、同之處。兩人能成為朋友，一定有共同語言和喜好，共性不容忽視。在表達喜好時，不同的句型應交叉運用，避免枯燥的重復。例“Our favourite colours are”，“We like best”，“We both like,too”，為突出不同時間做不同運動，用“On Saturdays”，“On Sundays”，形成鮮明對比。常使用并列連詞and 和轉折連詞 but ，使文章讀起來更流暢。結尾以How happy we are!突出了兩人從友誼中得到的快樂！ A Bad Cold    Im not feeling well today. I t

5、hink I have a bad cold. I have a headache. I have a fever. My nose hurts. My throat is sore. I have to take some medicine and stay in bed. My parents will take me to the hospital. What a bad cold!I hope I can be better soon. And I want to go to school. 【要領點評】寫法：這篇習作是按照時間順序記敘了得病、病的癥狀、服藥及治療的全過程。寫

6、出了小作者希望快點康復，好去上學的愿望。時態(tài)：這篇文章可以采用一般現在時來寫。如果主語是第三人稱單數，動詞別忘加s。句型：要用feel 加形容詞，和表示“患某種疾病“的用法have+表示的疾病的單詞。注意：在表示疾病時，可以使用-ache,hurt 和sore。不要只用一個單詞，以避免枯燥。要寫出得病后的簡單治療及心情，不能只寫得病的情況。常見病句：My nose is hurt。因為be后面要加形容詞，而hurt是動詞，因此應使用sore；東西放在床上要用on the bed。生病，是臥床不起，應該說stay in bed。表示吃藥時，通過用take some medicine，不用eat。

7、詞匯量要控制在4060之間。 Zooms Weekend    Zoom had a busy weekend. On Saturday morning, he washed his clothes and went to a park. He did his homework and went fishing on Saturday afternoon. On Sunday morning, he cleaned his room and visited his grandparents. He played football and watch TV

8、 on Sunday afternoon. Zoom was too tired. 【要領點評】寫法：這篇習作是按時間順序記敘了Zoom的周末活動。時態(tài)：這篇文章可以用三種時態(tài)來寫，由于本單元主要講的是一般過去時態(tài)，所以我們采用一般過去時態(tài)比較合適。句型：主語+動詞過去式+過去時間。注意：活動的相關表達法采用新舊知識結合的方法，但要注意動詞過去式的拼寫。 Toms Holiday    Tom went to Beijing by plane on his holiday. Every day he had fun with his paren

9、ts. They went to the Nature Park. They saw elephants. They went swimming. They ate lots of delicious food. They also took many beautiful pictures. They will come back home tomorrow. In a word, they enjoy their holiday. 【要領點評】寫法：這篇習作是按照地點的順序記敘假期里的活動，記敘了假期里去北京做了哪些活動以及對活動的感受。時態(tài)：這篇文章可采用兩種時態(tài)來寫。由于本單元

10、主要講述的是一般過去時的用法，所以這里大部分我們采用一般過去時比較合適。句型：主語+動詞過去式+其他主語+will+動詞原形+其他注意：活動的相關表達法可采用舊知識和新知識相結合去寫，但要注意動詞過去式的變化規(guī)則。例：eat 的過去式為ate，為不規(guī)則變化。 A Post Card from JohnDear Sarah,    This post card shows you a picture from my holiday. We got Kunming on Wednesday. On the first day we visited Stone

11、 Forest. Its very beautiful. I love it very much. On Thursday Kathy and I got lost in the city. We asked a policeman for help. He helped us find the hotel. On Friday we went to a small village. We saw folk dances and ate some fresh vegetables from the farm. We enjoyed ourselves. Last day we went sho

12、pping ane bought some presents for friends. Tomorrow we will be back home. John 【要領點評】寫法：這是一封明信片，按照時間順序記敘了約翰假期去昆明度假這幾天的活動。分別記敘了游覽石林，迷路，看民族舞，購物，買禮物等活動。時態(tài)：這篇文章由于是記敘已經發(fā)過的事，所以大部分可以采用一般過去時來寫。句型：主語+動詞過去式+其他。注意：描述已經發(fā)生過的事要用一般過去時，在寫這篇文章的時候要注意動詞的過去式的變化，尤其是動詞過去式的不規(guī)則變化。沒發(fā)生過的事要用一般將來時。 A Farewell P

13、arty    Its the end of the school year. The students in Class Three have a farewell party. They invite their parents to the party. Many students have performance at the party.Look! Chen Jie is singing songs. Zhang Peng is playing the piano. Sarah is playing the erhu. Mike is doing Chi

14、nese Kung fu. What is Miss White doing? She is dancing.    Everybody has a lot of fun. But Liu Yun isnt here. She has a cold. She is at home. The classmates are going to visit her after party. They prepare many gifts fot her. And they will take a picture together. 【要領點評】寫法：這篇習作記敘了一個告別晚會。記敘了學年末的告別晚會上大家都表演了什么節(jié)目，以及晚會后大家要去看望劉蕓的故事。時態(tài)：這篇習作可采用三種時態(tài)來寫。由于本單元主要出現的時態(tài)是一般將來時和現在進行時，所以這里我們才用一般現在時，現在進行時和