初中英語 滬教牛津版 9A Unit1 Wise men in history Writing：How to revise a piece of writing 課件

1、How to revise a piece of writingOxford English 9AUnit1 Wise men in historyWriting 深圳市龍崗區(qū)百合外國語學(xué)校 廖述霞Four steps1. Focusing on structure and clarity 2. Analyzing the content of your writing3. Editing spelling, grammar and punctuation mistakes4. Reading your work out loud1. Focusing on structure and cla

2、rity A well-organized essay or article leads the reader through a clear line of thinking. Generally speaking, a short essay consists of three parts: Paragraph 1Paragraph 2Paragraph 3Each of the paragraphs should relate to some aspects of your topic state the topic state the topic again Introduction

3、: Body :Conclusion : My HobbiesI have a lot of hobbies and enjoy doing many things in my free time._. I often read in my free time. I read many kinds of books. And I like the stories that have good endings. _. I like all kinds of music. I often listen to the music programs on radio. Although I cant

4、sing English songs well, I listen to them a lot, which help me learn English._. I often play ping-pong after classes. When I am doing sports, I forget all my trouble. In short, I enjoy my hobbies and they are very helpful to my health and my studies.I am a lover of readingI am also a music loverI li

5、ke sports as wellExampleTitle:totogeneralspecific specificgeneralstate the topic: I have a lot of hobbies and enjoy doing many things in my free time. Topic sentence: I am a lover of reading.Topic sentence: I am also a music lover.Topic sentence: I like sports as well.restate the topic: In short, I

6、enjoy my hobbies and they are very helpful to my health and my studies.My HobbiesIntroductionPara 2Para 1 ConclusionBody Para32.Analyzing the content of your writingDoes the writing have a unified point of view? Are all the points developed logically?Are the topic sentences and supporting details ar

7、ranged properly?Is the writing coherent with good transitions?Analyse your logic by constructing a backwards outline. Go through the outline to make sure all of your points are supporting the topic of the essay, and remove any information that doesnt contribute to the main focus.TopicAnalyse your lo

8、gic by constructing a backwards outline. (I have a lot of hobbies.)(I am a lover of reading.)(I am also a music lover.)(I enjoy my hobbies.)(I like sports as well.)TopicMy Hobbies My HobbiesI have a lot of hobbies and enjoy doing many things in my free time._ . I often read in my free time. I read m

9、any kinds of books. And I like the stories that have good endings. _. I like all kinds of music. I often listen to the music programs on radio. Although I cant sing English songs well, I listen to them a lot, which help me learn English._ . I often play ping-pong and basketball after classes. When I

10、 am doing sports, I forget all my trouble. In short, I enjoy my hobbies and they are very helpful to my health and my studies.I am a lover of readingI like sports as wellI am also a music loverBody: topic sentence+ supporting detail(s) Topic sentence1: I am a lover of reading.Supporting details (sen

11、tences): I often read in my free time. I read many kinds of books.And I like the stories that have good endings.The most important comes first!Para1Body: topic sentence+ supporting detail(s) Topic sentence1: I am a lover of reading.Supporting details (sentences): I often read in my free time. I read

12、 many kinds of books.And I like the stories that have good endings.Topic sentence2: I am also a music lover.Supporting details (sentences): I like all kinds of music.I often listen to the music programs on radio.Although I cant sing English songs well, I listen to them a lot, which help me learn Eng

13、lish.Topic sentence3: I like sports as well.Supporting details (sentences): I often play ping-pong and basketball after classes. When I am doing sports, I forget all my trouble. The most important comes first!Para1Para2Para3In my opinion, electricity is very precious in our life. We cannot see it, b

14、ut it contained in batteries. The chemicals inside it produce it. If we do not use it properly, we might be killed. With electricity, people can watch TV and play PC games. We must be careful with it. usefuldangerousWhat do you think of the paragraph?amazingdangerousTopic sentence: In my opinion, el

15、ectricity is very precious in our life.Supporting details:It needs lots of time and money to build a power station.Electricity comes to our flats from the power station far away.Coal and water the materials for producing electricity are precious.The first draftIn my opinion, electricity is very prec

16、ious in our life. It needs lots of time/money to build a power station. Electricity comes to our flats from the power station far away. Coal and water the materials for producing electricity are precious.In my opinion, electricity is very precious in our life. It comes into our flats through wires.

17、The wires are connected to the power station far away. Building power stations needs a lot of money and time. We usually use coal and water to make electricity and they are very precious. We must not waste electricity. We should make good use of it.The second draftIn my opinion, electricity is very

18、precious in our life. It needs lots of time/money to build a power station. Electricity comes to our flats from the power station far away. Coal and waterthe materials for producing electricity are precious.The First draftnew informationgiven informationnew informationnew informationnew informationg

19、iven informationgiven informationgiven informationIn my opinion, electricity is very precious in our life. It comes into our flats through wires. The wires are connected to the power station far away. Building power stations needs a lot of money and time. We usually use coal and water to make electr

20、icity and they are very precious. We must not waste electricity. We should make good use of it.The third draftThe second draftIn my opinion, electricity is very precious in our life. It comes into our flats through wires. The wires are connected to the power station far away. As we all know, buildin

21、g power stations needs a lot of money and time as well. In addition, we usually use coal and water to make electricity and they are also very precious. In a word, we must not waste electricity. We should make good use of it.transitionsThe use of transitionsTo improve the fluency流暢性 and coherence連貫性

22、of your writing, you may need to add transitions to show how one sentence relates to another and how one paragraph leads to the next.e.g.furthermore, moreover, in addition firstly, secondly, thirdly Many students have difficulty taking a test. They get poor grades on their quizzes. They must work ha

23、rder in class. They should spend more time reviewing and doing homework. Theyd better ask teachers for help if they have any questions. Many students have difficulty taking a test. As a result, they get poor grades on their quizzes. They must, therefore, work harder in class. In addition, they shoul

24、d spend more time reviewing and doing homework. Finally, theyd better ask teachers for help if they have any questions. The use of transitionsOnce you have finished writing, it is essential that you re-read your paragraph two or three times to check it for spelling, grammar and punctuation mistakes.

25、 3. Editing spelling, grammar and punctuation mistakesFind and underline the mistakes in the following story. Discuss the mistakes and, next to each line, write what kind of mistake it is. Use the abbreviations below. (P12)gr=grammar mistakesp=spelling mistakep=punctuation mistakeJulius Caesar kille

26、d by freindJulius Caesar was warn that someone wanted to kill him and he should not speak on public? He was standing on the steps of the Senate when he attacked. He said, “I must speak to my poeple.” As he died, he see his oldest friend Brutus. He was one of the killers, “You too, Brutus?” he asked,

27、 and die.spgrgr/pgrsp/grpgrJulius Caesar killed by friendJulius Caesar was warned that someone wanted to kill him and he should not speak in public. He was standing on the steps of the Senate when he was attacked. He said, “I must speak to my people. ”As he died, he saw his oldest friend Brutus. He was one of the killers. “You too, Brutus?” he asked, and died.spgrgr/pgrsp/grpgrOther common punctuation mistakesHarry Potteris my favorite series of fantasy novels.Harry Potter is my favorite series of fantasy novels. (italics) I like ice-cream、chocolate