續(xù)寫中的句子的擴展與壓縮-2023年新高考英語讀后續(xù)寫提分技能

1、2023年新高考英語讀后續(xù)寫提分技能2.02續(xù)寫中的句子的擴展與壓縮回顧2012年王初明提出讀后續(xù)寫法，通過“讀”輸入故事的情節(jié)主線，細節(jié)信息及文體 特點，再通過“續(xù)寫”，結(jié)合輸入內(nèi)容和自身理解，在保持與原文一致的情況下半開放式 的設(shè)計新的情節(jié)，產(chǎn)生協(xié)同效應(yīng)。根據(jù)協(xié)同效應(yīng)的原理，文秋芳進一步提出，輸入促進 輸出，把輸入與輸出之間有機聯(lián)系在一起，提高學(xué)習(xí)者的輸入效能，并將輸入中獲得的信息 吸收內(nèi)化，最終提高輸出的質(zhì)量。在這些讀后續(xù)寫設(shè)計理念的背后，傳達出對續(xù)寫局部的關(guān) 鍵要求，即一定要考生在輸入階段準確地把握住原文的文體風(fēng)格和基本情節(jié)走向之后，在 保持整體一致的前提下續(xù)寫原文。正如王初明所提倡的

2、，要通過模仿不斷獲取新的語言知識, 將內(nèi)容創(chuàng)造與語言模仿有機結(jié)合，強力打造語言表達能力，才能做到以讀促寫，協(xié)同提升語 言能力。根據(jù)高考命題要求，讀后續(xù)寫閱讀局部為350詞左右的記敘文，話題貼近考生生活，具 有一定的趣味性，常以人物的經(jīng)歷或事件的開展變化為主，以表達和描寫為主要表達方式。 這就要求，在考生續(xù)寫的150詞左右的內(nèi)容中既要合理地表達故事情節(jié)，又要對故事中主 要人物的心理活動，動作表情及外部環(huán)境等方面進行生動地描述。而后者恰恰是考生經(jīng)常忽 略或者做得不夠的地方。有局部考生寫作的內(nèi)容基本上是表達情節(jié)，缺乏甚至沒有任何描寫, 或者有簡單的描寫但是語言使用不正確。造成這一情況背后的原因除了考

3、生語言基礎(chǔ)之外還 有考生對這一文體內(nèi)容模仿寫作經(jīng)驗過少，閱讀量不夠等。而在寫作與模仿實踐中，對句子 擴展或壓縮就非常重要。讀后續(xù)寫中的句子擴展在讀后續(xù)寫中，有的同學(xué)寫的短句過多，內(nèi)容不具體，缺乏生動性，導(dǎo)致詞數(shù)不夠。 我們可以在簡短句的基礎(chǔ)上恰當(dāng)添加定語、狀語等修飾成分或增加并列結(jié)構(gòu)等，擴展句子, 豐富內(nèi)容，使表達更具體、更形象。(-)利用同位語擴充句子同位語主要使用名詞短語和同位語從句。例如：(2016年10月浙江卷)She saw her husband.她看到了她的丈夫。There, she saw her husband, a man staring at her, wearing a

4、n expression of relief. 在那里, 她看到了她的丈夫，一個正盯著 她看的男人，帶著寬慰的表情?！痉治觥吭诰涫滋砑恿说攸c狀語There,在husband后面增加了同位語a man staring at her,其后還有一個分詞短語wearing an expression of relief做狀語，補充說明丈夫看著她 時流露出來的表情。這種形象具體的描寫，增加了畫面感，也提升了整個句子的層次。（二）利用狀語擴充句子添加的狀語，可以是副詞、非謂語動詞、介詞短語和狀語從句等。例如：（2016年10月浙江卷）Jane walked on.簡繼續(xù)走。Jane walked on f

5、or quite a long time.簡繼續(xù)走了 很長時間。With no path to follow, Jane walked on for quite a long time.因為無路可循, 簡繼續(xù)走了 很長時間?！痉治觥刻砑觙or quite a long time和with no path to follow兩個做狀語的介詞短語后， 句子表達更為生動具體了。（三）利用定語擴充句子定語擴句的主要方式是使用形容詞、非謂語動詞、介詞短語和定語從句等。例如：His mother works in a big company.他母親在一家大公司工作。His loving mother, w

6、ho used to be an excellent English teacher in a middle school, now works in a big company.他的慈母，曾經(jīng)是一名優(yōu)秀的中學(xué)英語老師，現(xiàn)在在一家大公司工 作?！痉治觥课覀冊谥髡Zmother前添加了形容詞loving,更形象地說明了 his mother的特征; 在 mother 后面添力II 了 who used to be an excellent English teacher in a middle school, 內(nèi)容更 豐富，讓讀者更加了解母親。（四）遞進式擴充句子對先后發(fā)生的兩個或多個連貫動作，可

7、以采用遞進式。主要方式有（1）用and連接;用 after that, additionally, furthermore, whats more, to make things worse 等 。 例如：Mac then jumped off the bicycle.然后麥克從自行車上跳了下來。Mac then jumped off the bicycle and he was ready to fight against the wolf.麥克從自行車上 跳下來，準備跟狼搏斗?！痉治觥俊疤伦孕熊嚒迸c“準備搏斗”兩個連貫動作，讓Mac準備跟狼搏斗的形象 躍然紙上。（五）轉(zhuǎn)折式擴充句子表示轉(zhuǎn)

8、折的有but, however等。例如：Jane kept moving.簡繼續(xù)往前走。Jane kept moving, but the farther she walked, the more confused she became. 簡繼續(xù)往前走， 但她走得越遠，就越感到困惑。【分析】添加后面的轉(zhuǎn)折分句后，暗示著“她可能迷路了二（六）因果式擴充句子除了引導(dǎo)原因狀語從句和結(jié)果狀語從句的連詞后，還 有due to, owing to, on account of, because of, as a result of 等表示 原因，therefore, as a result 等表示結(jié)果。例

9、如：He has broken his leg.他摔壞 了 腿。He has broken his leg and therefore he can t walk.他摔壞 了腿,因此不能走路了 。讀后續(xù)寫中的句子壓縮雖然讀后續(xù)寫的語料不同，但在續(xù)寫的寫作中，根據(jù)需要進行語段壓縮的方法是可以通 用的。常用的壓縮語段的方法有如下幾種：.摘取法。找出語段材料的主旨句，直接摘取關(guān)鍵成分作為答案。或者將分散在各句 中的重要信息找出來，摘取關(guān)鍵詞語，再將其進行連綴。.概括法。沒有中心句，也沒有明顯關(guān)鍵詞的閱讀材料，如果要壓縮出主要內(nèi)容，那么 可以采用概括法，分別用一兩個恰當(dāng)?shù)脑~語去概括文句的意思，再組合答

10、案。.整合法。如果語段材料沒有中心句，其表達材料主旨的關(guān)鍵詞語可能分散在幾個句 子中，這就需要考生將分散在各處的關(guān)鍵詞語找出來，將包含重要信息的句子加以綜合概括, 然后將找出的關(guān)鍵詞與概括出來的內(nèi)容加以整合，形成符合題干要求的短句。.替換法。閱讀材料中有能夠表達語段主旨的中心句，且中心句中有關(guān)鍵的詞語，這 時候就可以運用此法將指示代詞替換成語意明確的詞語。.補充法。閱讀材料中有能夠表達語段主旨的中心句，但將其壓縮成主干后，還需要 在中心詞前面補充出修飾、限制性的定語，才能讓句意完整明確，這時候就可以運用補充法 為主干中心詞補出修飾、限定性的詞語。實踐強化基礎(chǔ)演練（2022.山東.肥城市教學(xué)研究

11、中心模擬預(yù)測）閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語 續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。Spelling was my favorite subject in fourth grade. Every week I memorized the new words, and by Friday I was prepared to take the spelling test. I usually got all the words right. My teacher, Mrs Casazza, usually wrote Excellent!”on the top of my paper.One

12、 day, Mrs Casazza announced to the class that we would have a spelling bee （拼字比賽） on Thursday. Oh, no J I thought. Last month when I had to stand in the front of the class and give a book report, my arms shook so badly that it was hard to read my paper. I was very conscious of the twenty-seven pairs

13、 of eyes on me and all I wanted to do was to run back to my seat. A spelling bee would be even worse. I wouldnt have a paper to read from!After lunch on Thursday, Mrs Casazza explained the rules. “Say the word, spell it, and then say it again J she said. “Be careful not to repeat any letters.One at

14、a time, she pronounced a word for each student to spell. Two boys made mistakes right away and had to sit down. With sweaty hands, I waited for my turn. After the girl next to me correctly spelled her word, Mrs Casazza called my name and said “Your word is echo.“Echo J I started. Then my mind went b

15、lank. Everyone was looking at me, waiting fbr me to speak out the first letter. But I couldnt think. My foce got hot and I was unable to finish the word. Mrs Casazza had to let me sit down. Afterwards, Mrs Casazza said it worked so well that she decided to have a spelling bee every Thursday.Afraid t

16、hat Id mess up again, I didnt want to go to school the following Thursday. Whats wrong? my mother asked. I told her about the spelling bee and explained that I was nervous when they were all looking at me. Youre a good speller and you do so well in your tests, so just believe in yourself/ Mum said.注

17、意：.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為15。左右；.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。The encouragement from Mum gave me much confidence in myself.“Very good J Mrs Casazza said with a cheerful smile on her face.源語篇句子擴展壓縮導(dǎo)引句子擴展句子壓縮原句擴展句Be careful not to repeat any letters.You should be careful not to repeat any letters.With sweaty hands, I waited for

18、my turn.I waited for my turn while my hands were sweating.原句壓縮句Every week I memorized the new words, and by Friday I was prepared to take the spelling test.Every week I memorized the new words, and by Friday to take the spelling test.Last month when I had to stand in the front of the class and give

19、a book report, my arms shook so badly that it was hard to read my paper.Last month standing in the front of the class to give a book report, my arms shook so badly that it was hard to read my paper.【答案】The encouragement from Mum gave me much confidence in myself. Soon the spelling bee was coming aga

20、in and my word was“piece”, “Piece,“ I started. “P. ” The strange feeling that everyone was staring at me began to appear again, but I remembered what Mum had said.Taking a deep breath, I had a big smile on my face. My mind cleared and I concentrated. Now did the word start with P-I or P-E? I knew th

21、is. Wed learned that there is a “pie inpiece. “I-E-C-E,“ I said. “Piece.”“Very good, Mrs Casazza said with a cheerful smile on her face. I did it once, so I knew I could do it again. Throughout the year, I even won a few spelling bees. It worked so well that I had so much fun from the spelling bee a

22、nd looked forward to it every Thursday. Thanks to my mother, I wasnt afraid of standing in the front of the class. Now, I have more confidence in myself at school, jumping at the chance to give speeches and book reports.【寫作解析】本文以人物為線索，講述了作者四年級時參加拼寫比賽，但由于緊張不自信， 在第一次比賽中失敗?；氐郊液?，受到媽媽的鼓勵，終于戰(zhàn)勝自己內(nèi)心的恐懼，在下一次

23、比 賽時有了出色的表現(xiàn)。.段落續(xù)寫：由第一段首句內(nèi)容“媽媽的鼓勵給我我極大的自信”可知，第一段描述作者的媽媽鼓勵了作 者，于是作者開始重拾信心并開始認真練習(xí)的過程。由第二段首句內(nèi)容“非常棒！ Mrs. Casazza臉上洋溢著歡快的笑容“可知，第二段描述作者 在經(jīng)過認真的練習(xí)之后，有了很大的進步，得到Mrs. Casazza的認可與贊揚，并取得出色成 績，由此獲得了自信。.續(xù)寫線索：媽媽鼓勵收獲信心認真練習(xí)重新比賽獲得認可.詞匯激活行為類：面帶微笑：have a big smile on face-wear a big smile on face；集中注意力： concentrate一fbcu

24、s； 抓住機會：jump at the chancetake advantage of the opportunity； 做 某事彳艮愉快：have fun from doing sth.一have a good time in doing sth.情緒類：擔(dān)憂：be afraid of-be scared of；給與信心：give much confidencelift onesspirits【典型句式】【句型 1 】Taking a deep breath, I had a big smile on my face.（運用 了 非謂語動詞作狀語）【句型 2】It worked so wel

25、l that I had so much fun from the spelling bee and looked forward to it every Thursday.（運用了 so.that.引導(dǎo)結(jié)果狀語從句）綜合演練（2022湖北模擬預(yù)測）閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu) 成一篇完整的短文。An A for Mrs. BartlettI was sitting next to Missy in my ninth-grade world history class when Mrs. Bartlett announced a new project. In gr

26、oups, we were to create a poster around what we were studying.On a piece of paper, we wrote the names of three friends we wanted in our group. After collecting all the requests, Mrs. Bartlett informed us that she would take into consideration the names we chose and would let us know the results the

27、next day. I was a well-rounded top student in the class, so I had no doubt I would get the group of my choice. There were only a handful of sociably decent people in the class, and Missy was one of them. I knew we had chosen each other.The next day, I anxiously awaited the class. After the bell rang

28、, Missy and I stopped talking as Mrs. Bartlett called for our attention. She started to call out names. When she reached group three, Missys name was called. So Im in group three, I thought. The second, third and fourth members of the group were called. My name was not included. There had to be some

29、 mistake!Then I heard it. The last group: Mauro, Juliette, Rachel, Karina. I could feel the tears well in my eyes. How could I face being in that group - the boy who barely spoke English, the one girl who was always covered by skirts that went down to her ankles, and the other girl who was often wea

30、ring very strange and unusual clothes with fancy items. They certainly fell into the category of the least popular in our class. They were considered misfits （不合群的人）！There must be something wrong! Mrs. Bartlett was such a person of insight, vision and thoughtfulness that she never forgot to bring ou

31、t the potential of all her students. Oh, how badly I wanted to be with my friends. Finally I was detennined to convince her I should be in the good group. 注意：L續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；2,請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。Paragraph 1:I fought hack tears as I walked up to Mrs. Bartlett.Paragraph 2:Halfway through the week, I felt

32、myself enjoying the company of these three misfits.【答案】I fought back tears as I walked up to Mrs. Bartlett. Before I opened my mouth, she gently placed a hand on my shoulder, saying with a knowing smile, I know what you want, but your group needs you. So stunned was I that I couldnt utter a single w

33、ord for a moment. She had seen something in me that I hadnt seen. Suddenly, a mixture of guilt as well as pride seized me. The power of being trusted made me stand straighter. Ill help them. I replied in a firm voice. I couldnt believe it came out of my mouth, but it did.Halfway through the week, I

34、felt myself enjoying the company of these three misfits. The project was going smoothly with our joint efforts. Besides, I found out Mauro was struggling with English, Juliette wore long skirts because of her religion and Rachel dreamed to be a fashion designer. They werent misfits, just people that

35、 no one cared enough about to try to understand except Mrs. Bartlett. I was lucky to be given a chance to see other people in a new light. Mrs. Bartlett gave us an A on that assignment, which should be handed back, for she was the one who truly deserved it.（2022.山東濱州二模）閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu) 成

36、一篇完整的短文。When the Gilberts first moved to the city, they began looking for a new home. For their daughter Elise, aged 12, her dream-like house will have a big backyard with grass and flowers.“I hope it will have a tree where there birds can play. Elises brother Frank, a bird-lover, echoed her more th

37、an once.But it was not easy to find a house that pleased them. For six weeks the Gilberts hunted and hunted. At last, they found one and moved into the new house. However, there was not a blade of grass anywhere, or even a small bush. Smooth concrete only! Out of expectation, in one corner of the ya

38、rd stood a tall white flagpole. At the foot of the pole was a low place filled to the edge with clear, sparkling water.“I dont suppose that we shall be able to make friends with the birds.?9 Elise was in low spirits. Frank, biting his lips, said nothing.The next day was Saturday. Elise and her Mum w

39、ent out shopping as usual. Frank went out into the yard and examined the flagpole for a long time. As he stood looking at the hard concrete, he thought to himself, “It does seem lonesome. Then something made him look up, two little birds fluttering above the bead around the top of the flagpole! ”Well,“ cried the surprised boy, I do believe birds wou