陜西省2016年高考英語命題作文寫作技巧

WritingSkillsTeachinggoals

-----教學(xué)目標(biāo)HowtomakeanoutlineHowtopickoutimportantpointsHowtowritebeautifulsentencesHowtoorganizethesentenceslogically假設(shè)你是李華,你購買了一部某外國公司生產(chǎn)的手機.因有質(zhì)量問題,要求該公司更換.請根據(jù)下列要點,用英文寫一封電子郵件.1.問題:手機不響鈴,不能發(fā)短信;該產(chǎn)品已售完,無法更換;型號新,無配件,無法維修.2.要求:公司應(yīng)盡快予以更換.注意:1.詞數(shù)為120左右;2.參考詞匯:配件(sparepart)Thestyle:

exposition（說明文）Themainidea:PresenttheproblemswiththephoneandaskforachangePerson:

thefirstperson第一人稱Tense:thepresenttense

現(xiàn)在式

andthepasttense過去式Task1Examinethecontentcarefully

Task2提煉要點,確定重點詞匯,劃分段落Importantpoints：threeproblemsplus

onedemand要點：三個問題加一個要求Point1:

notring;notsendmessagesPoint2：soldout;notchange…for…

或notexchange…for…或notreplace…with…

Point3：

newmodel;nospareparts;repair/fix/maintain

Point4：

require/requestsb.todosth

或demandofsb.todosth.Task3連詞成句1.手機不響鈴,不能發(fā)短信

Itdoesn’tring.Itdoesn’tsendshortmessages.2.該產(chǎn)品已售完,無法更換

Themodelhasbeensoldout.Theycan’tchangeanewoneforme.3.型號新,無配件,無法維修

ItisanewmodelinChina.Itisimpossibletofixitwithouttherightspareparts.4.要求公司應(yīng)盡快予以更換

Idemandof/require/requestyourcompanytochangeanewoneformeassoonaspossible.Task4

提升句子，組句成篇注意：靈活運用好句式一.使用非謂語動詞(nonfiniteverb)使句子簡潔高檔二.巧用倒裝(inversion)結(jié)構(gòu)增強句子的表現(xiàn)力三.嘗試多樣化表達(dá)方式,如：

1.感嘆句(theexclamatory)2.with短語

3.定語從句(theattributiveclause)

4.各種名詞性從句5.各種狀語從句(theadverbialclause)1.手機不響鈴,不能發(fā)短信整合前：Itdoesn’tring.Itdoesn’tsendshortmessages.整合后：可以造至少兩個并列句(or,meanwhile,either)a.Itcan’tringorsendshortmessages.b.Itdoesn’tringatallandmeanwhileitdoesn’tsendshortmessages.（Neither….nor句式）c.Itcanneitherringnorsendshortmessages.可造至少兩個倒裝句式（notonly…butalso,nor,neither

）d.Notonlydoesitfailtoring,butalsoitcan’tsendamessage.e.Themobilephonecan’tring,

norcanitsendmessages.2.該產(chǎn)品已售完,無法更換整合前：Themodelhasbeensoldout.Theycan’tchangeanewoneforme.整合后：a.Thenewmodelhasbeensoldout

sothat

theycan’tchangeanewoneforme.b.Themodelhasbeensoldout,

asa

consequence,

it’simpossibleforthemtochangeanewoneforme.(非限制性定語從句nonfiniteattributiveclause)c.Themodelhasbeensoldout,whichmakesitimpossibleformetohaveanewone.（主語從句）d.Thefactthatthemodelhasbeensoldoutmakesmeunabletochangeit.（結(jié)果狀語從句至少兩個sothat，asaconsequence/result）3.型號新,無配件,無法維修整合前：ItisanewmodelinChina.Itisimpossibletofixitwithouttherightspareparts.整合后：a.Since

it’sanewmodel

andthere’renospareparts,Ican’tgetitrepaired

.b.Sonewisitstype

withoutanysparepartsthatIcan’tgetitrepaired.c.With

itsnewtypeandnosparepartsleft,

Ifindithardtohaveitrepaired.原因狀語從句because，since，as和倒裝句各一個so…thatwith結(jié)構(gòu)一個

4.要求公司應(yīng)盡快予以更換整合前：Irequire/requestyourcompanytochangeanewoneformeassoonaspossible.整合后：

賓語從句Toconclude,I

demand/require/requestthat

yourcompany

should

havemyphonechangedassoonaspossible.

用appreciateitifB.I’dreallyappreciateitif

youcouldreplaceitsoon.

包含賓語從句、同位語從句、虛擬語氣及被動語態(tài)的句子C.Ihopethat

myrequirement

that

you

should

changeanewphoneofthesamemodelformecan

besatisfied

assoonaspossible.5.檢查謄寫仔細(xì)謄寫，保證字跡工整，卷面整潔。Whichoneispreferred?DearSir,

……Tendaysafterthat,itdidn’tringorsendshortmessages.ThenItookittotheseller,but

wastoldthatthemodelhadbeensoldoutand

Ihadtowaitatleastthreemonthsforanewone.LaterIwenttotherepairman.Hesaidsinceitwasanew-modelinChina,itwasimpossibletofixitwithouttherightspareparts.Iwassodesperateonhearingthat.HowcanIwaitthatlong?

Therefore,Irequirethatyousendmeanewoneofthesamemodelwithinamonth.

Thankyouforyourconsideration.

Yours,