英語(yǔ)小笑話(帶翻譯)).

1、1Boy: Is this seat empty?Girl: Yes and this one will be if you sit down.男孩：這個(gè)座位是空的么？女孩：是的，如果你坐下，我的座位也將是空的。2， Boy: Can I buy you a drink?Girl: Actually I'd rather have the money.男孩：我可以給你買(mǎi)杯飲料嗎？女孩：你不如直接把錢(qián)給我得了。3.My little dog can't readMrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!

2、Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.我的狗不識(shí)字布朗夫人：哦，親愛(ài)的，我把珍愛(ài)的小狗給丟了！史密斯夫人：可是你該在報(bào)紙上登廣告??！布朗夫人：沒(méi)有用的，我的小狗不認(rèn)識(shí)字?！?.反正我太太明天會(huì)來(lái)?yè)Q的MyWifeWillExchange ThemA gentleman walks into a store and asked for a pair of gloves.Cloth or leather

3、asked the salesperson.Makes no differencereplied customer.What color asked the clerk.Anyhe responded.Size Give me whateveryou prefer the gentleman said slightlyexasperated. My wifewillbe back tomorrowto exchange them. 反正我太太明天會(huì)來(lái)?yè)Q的一位先生走進(jìn)一家商店要買(mǎi)副手套。“您是要布的還是皮的？”售貨員問(wèn)。“沒(méi)什么區(qū)別。 ”這位顧客回答。“那您要什么顏色的呢？”售貨員又問(wèn)?！笆裁搭?/p>

4、色都成?！彼卮?。“號(hào)碼呢？ ”“您就隨便給我拿一副吧，”這位顧客有點(diǎn)不耐煩了，“反正我太太明天都會(huì)來(lái)?yè)Q的?！?.Aphysics ExaminationOnce in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his class mates were thinking it hard.The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thund er rolls?Nick s

5、 answer: Becauseour eyes are before ears.一次物理考試在一次物理考試時(shí)，當(dāng)同學(xué)們都還在苦思冥想時(shí)，尼克很快就答好了第一個(gè)問(wèn)題。這個(gè)問(wèn)題是：為什么在打雷時(shí)，我們總是先看到閃電后聽(tīng)到雷聲？尼克的回答是：因?yàn)檠劬υ谇?，耳朵在后?.Jim HistoryExaminationUncle: Howdid Jim do in his historyexamination?Mother:Oh, not at all well,but there, it wasn't his fault.They asked himthings that happened b

6、efore the poor boy was born.吉姆的歷史考試舅舅：吉姆這孩子歷史考得怎么樣？母親：唉，糟透了。可話又說(shuō)回來(lái)，這也不能怪他。嗨，他們盡問(wèn)一些這個(gè)可憐的孩子出生前的事兒。7.he is really somebody- My uncle has 1000 men under him.- He is really somebody. What does he do?- A maintenance man in a cemetery.他真是一個(gè)大人物- 我叔叔下面有 1000 個(gè)人。- 他真是一個(gè)大人物。干什么的？- 墓地守墓人。8I Have His Ear in My P

7、ocketIvan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?""A kid bit me," replied Ivan."Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother."I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."他的耳朵在我衣兜里伊凡鼻子流著血回到家里。他媽媽問(wèn)， “發(fā)生了什么事？ ” “一個(gè)男孩咬了我一口， ”伊凡說(shuō)?！霸僖?jiàn)到他你能認(rèn)出來(lái)嗎？”媽媽問(wèn)?！八叩侥睦镂叶寄苷J(rèn)出他，”伊凡說(shuō)。 “他的耳朵還在我衣兜里呢。”9Three-year-old boy took a three-year-old girl's hand and said: "I love you." The little girl said:"can you get me for the future?" The little boy said: "of c