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概要寫作示例與寫作訓(xùn)練5
【寫作示例】
【原文呈現(xiàn)】
閱讀下面短文,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容寫一篇60詞左右的內(nèi)容概要。
InNewYorkCitypublicschools,176differentlanguagesarespokenamongthemorethan1
millionstudents.For160,000children,Englishisnottheirfirstlanguage.NewYork'sDepartment
ofEducationmakeslearningbetterforthesestudentsbyprovidingdual-languageprograms.
Studentsaretaughtintwolanguages,Englishandanotherone,likeChineseorRussian.Math,
socialstudies,scienceandallotherregularcoursesaretaughtinbothlanguages.Andtheylearn
aboutthecultureoftheothercountry.
MiladyBaezisDeputyChancellor(副局長(zhǎng))ofEnglishLanguageLearnersandStudent
Support.Shesaysthesedual-languageprogramswillhelpchildrensucceedinthefuture."The
jobsofthefuturerequirethatourstudentsknowmorethanonelanguage.Theyaregoingtobe
travelingabroad,theyaregoingtobecommunicatingwithpeoplefromallovertheworld.This
willopendoorsforthem.^^
ShuyaZhangteachesaduallanguageclass.Shesaystheprogramhelpschildrengetreadyto
workwithpeopleinothercountries.<4Lookatnow-a-days,Americastartedeconomicrelationships
withChina.LotsofcompanieshavebeenmovedtoChina.Theyneedpeoplewiththeskillswith
bothlanguageskills.^^
Middleschoolstudentsmightnothavejobsontheirmindsyet.ForKequingJaing,shelikes
keepingupherfirstlanguage,Mandarin.C4Itmakesme,feelthatIamhomebecauseIcanspeakin
Chinese,learninChinese,whilelearninginEnglish.Soitmakesmefeelbetterandmakesme
understandmoreaboutthetaskI'mleaming.,,Anotherstudent,AnastasiaHudikova,cametothe
UnitedStateswhenshewas2yearsold.ShesaystheRussian-Englishprogramkeepsher
connectedtoherherilage(傳統(tǒng))andherparentshappy."They'rereallyhappyabouttheprogram
thatitexists.TheyarereallyhappythatIcanpreservemycultureandmylanguage,thatIcan
speakitfluentlyinschool.”
TheNewYorkschoolsalsoofferdual-languageprogramsinsevenotherlanguages:Arabic,
French,HaitianCreole,Hebrew,Korean,PolishandSpanish.Thereareplanstoaddevenmore
languagesinthefuture.(344words)
【思維路徑】
[核心內(nèi)容]
本文是一篇說明文,全文共分五段。第一段主要講了紐約教育部為了母語(yǔ)非英語(yǔ)的學(xué)生
能受到更好的教育而提供了雙語(yǔ)項(xiàng)目。第二段講了MiladyBaez的觀點(diǎn)一一雙語(yǔ)教學(xué)有助于
學(xué)生在未來(lái)取得成功。第三段講了一位雙語(yǔ)教學(xué)的老師ShuyaZhang的觀點(diǎn)一一雙語(yǔ)教學(xué)能
夠讓學(xué)生們準(zhǔn)備好未來(lái)與其他國(guó)家的人一起合作。第四段講述了兩個(gè)學(xué)生對(duì)雙語(yǔ)教學(xué)的看法。
第五段關(guān)于雙語(yǔ)教學(xué)在紐約的一些學(xué)校的現(xiàn)狀以及未來(lái)的發(fā)展。
[寫作思路]
(I)理清文章脈絡(luò)、概括段落大意。理清文章脈絡(luò)、概括段落大意是寫摘要的基礎(chǔ),同
學(xué)們可以通過找主題句、分析段落的邏輯關(guān)系來(lái)梳理文章的脈絡(luò),概括大意。本文采用“呈
現(xiàn)現(xiàn)象(Para.l)一講述不同人的看法(Para24)一總結(jié)(Para.5)”的形式,文章結(jié)構(gòu)比較清晰,
相對(duì)而言對(duì)于文章脈絡(luò)的梳理比較容易。該文第一段的主題句是“NewYork'sDepartmentof
Educationmakeslearningbetterforthesestudentsbyprovidingdual-languageprogramsMo第二段
的主題句是"Shesaystheprogramhelpschildrengetreadytoworkwithpeopleinother
countries"。第三段的主題句是"Shesaystheprogramhelpschildrengetreadytoworkwith
peopleinothercountries",,第四段沒有現(xiàn)成的主題句,需要對(duì)兩位學(xué)生的話語(yǔ)的內(nèi)容進(jìn)行概
括。第五段是對(duì)紐約市雙語(yǔ)教學(xué)現(xiàn)狀的總結(jié)以及學(xué)校對(duì)雙語(yǔ)教學(xué)未來(lái)發(fā)展的計(jì)劃。
(2)確定表達(dá)要點(diǎn)、靈活準(zhǔn)確表達(dá)。每段的段落大意都是我們要表達(dá)的要點(diǎn),這可以確
保不漏點(diǎn)。本文的主要內(nèi)容是"dual-languageprograms",因此可以將第一段的現(xiàn)象描述概
括后作為概要的首句。在確定表達(dá)要點(diǎn)后要思考如何準(zhǔn)確靈活表達(dá),這是難點(diǎn)。因?yàn)樵u(píng)分標(biāo)
準(zhǔn)要求完全使用自己的語(yǔ)言。靈活表達(dá)的重要技巧是對(duì)原來(lái)的語(yǔ)言進(jìn)行同義替換(paraphrase),
同時(shí)要對(duì)相關(guān)內(nèi)容進(jìn)行整合。第一段包括一個(gè)要點(diǎn),要點(diǎn)1是紐約教育部門為學(xué)生提供雙語(yǔ)
項(xiàng)目來(lái)促進(jìn)他們學(xué)習(xí)。根據(jù)原文所表達(dá)的意思,我們可以將原文的主題句換另一種說法來(lái)表
達(dá),可以使用非謂語(yǔ)4<toimprovetheirlearninglanguage并將uprovidew替換成“offer”。
要點(diǎn)2,3分別位于文章第二段和第三段,可以抓住“succeedinthefuture”和“getreadytowork
withpeopleinothercountries”的主題句,將其結(jié)合起來(lái)?起概括,可以用“becomesuccessful”
替換原文中的動(dòng)詞“succeed",用upeoplearoundtheworldn替換原文中的"peopleinother
countries\要點(diǎn)4要根據(jù)第四段進(jìn)行概括。主要是從學(xué)習(xí)者的角度出發(fā),表達(dá)雙語(yǔ)學(xué)習(xí)的
好處,可以將兩個(gè)學(xué)生所說的話找共同點(diǎn)一起歸納,如用“guaranteethecontinuous
learning...^o要點(diǎn)7可以用被動(dòng)“beadded”來(lái)替換原文中的主動(dòng)“add”。
[參考范文]
Toimprovetheirlearning,NewYork'sDepartmentofEducationoffersdual-language
programsforthosestudentswhosefirstlanguageisnotEnglish.(要點(diǎn)1)Dual-languageprograms
willhelpchildrenworkwithpeoplearoundtheworldandbecomesuccessfulinthefuture.(要點(diǎn)
2,3)Inaddition,itcanguaranteethecontinuouslearningoftheirnativecultureandthepracticeof
theirnativelanguage,whichisbeneficialtotheirdevelopment.(要點(diǎn)4)Consideringallthebenefits,
Moredual-languageprogramswillbeaddedinthefuture.(要點(diǎn)5)(76words)
[范文解析I
范文把要點(diǎn)1用“toimprovetheirlearning9,替代原文中的“makeslearningbetter并
將“provide”用“offer”替代,表達(dá)上將對(duì)象以定語(yǔ)從句的形式融入到一個(gè)句子。要點(diǎn)2,3
中用aaroundtheworld替換原文的ainothercountries用abecomesuccessfulw替換原文
的"succeed",并且將兩者結(jié)合起來(lái)表達(dá)。要點(diǎn)4用“guaranteethecontinuouslearningoftheir
nativecultureandthepracticeoftheirnativelanguage”對(duì)兩個(gè)不同國(guó)籍和語(yǔ)言的學(xué)生的例子和
體會(huì)概括了。要點(diǎn)5用了被動(dòng)語(yǔ)態(tài)替換了原文中的主動(dòng)語(yǔ)態(tài),并且根據(jù)對(duì)全文的理解,用
“moredual-languageprograms替換了原文的“evenmorelanguages”。然后對(duì)各要點(diǎn)進(jìn)行了
適當(dāng)?shù)恼虾豌暯?。要點(diǎn)2,3和4之間用銜接語(yǔ)“inaddition”連接,讓文本更通順。要點(diǎn)5
是未來(lái)的發(fā)展,為了讓概寫更加緊湊,范文中加了個(gè)原因狀語(yǔ)“consideringallthebenefits\
I提煉歸納]
1.語(yǔ)義轉(zhuǎn)換
語(yǔ)義轉(zhuǎn)換是新題型概要寫作中很重要的一項(xiàng)基本技能,因?yàn)樵u(píng)價(jià)標(biāo)準(zhǔn)對(duì)“使用自己的語(yǔ)
言進(jìn)行觀點(diǎn)的獨(dú)立表達(dá)”有較高的要求。本范文中主要通過同義詞替換達(dá)到這一要求,比如
**offer",**aroundtheworld,**becomesuccessn等詞的使用都是為了替換原文中的表達(dá)。
2.結(jié)構(gòu)轉(zhuǎn)換
除了同義詞和同義詞組的替換外,我們也可以從從句、非謂、主動(dòng)被動(dòng)語(yǔ)態(tài)的轉(zhuǎn)換等語(yǔ)
法角度進(jìn)行改寫。比如本文中的第一句話,是將原文的句子結(jié)構(gòu)進(jìn)行了改寫,從而同時(shí)達(dá)到
paraphrase和內(nèi)容整合的要求。
【寫作演練】
1.閱讀下面短文,根據(jù)內(nèi)容寫一篇60詞左右的內(nèi)容概要。
IsFastFashionTakingOver?
Thefashionindustryhaschangedsignificantlyinrecentyears.Traditionally,fashion
retailers(零售商)createdtwoclothingcollectionsperyear,calledseasons.Nowadays,incontrast,
theycandesignandmanufacture(生產(chǎn))clothesinaslittleasfourweeks.FastFashionmeansthat
thelatestdesignsshownatthefashionshowsinParis,London,NewYork,andMilancanbe
copedandsoldinshoppingmallswithinamonth.
Theadvantagesofrapidlychangingfashionsareclear.Shorteningthelifecycleofaproduct
meansthatifadesigndoesn'tsellwellwithinaweek,itistakenoutofthestoresandreplaced
withanewone.Thisisgoodformanufacturers,asitmeansagreatervolumeofsales.Itisalso
goodforcustomers,whocankeepupwithfast-movingtrendscheaplyandwhocanenjoyfinding
somethingneweverytimetheyvisitthestore.
However,therearealsoanumberofdisadvantagestothefast-fashionapproach.Perhapsthe
biggestconcernistheimpactofwastedclothesontheenvironment.Thelowcostofmostfast
fashionenablesshopperstobuyseveralnewsetsofclotheseachseason.Thismeansthathuge
amountsofclothingarethrownaway.Furthermore,withfashionschangingsoquickly,cotton
growersneedtoproducemorecottonmorecheaply,andthatmeansusingmorepesticidesand
chemicals.Athirdproblemisthetheftofideas.Fashionhousesinvestalotoftimeandmoneyin
newdesigns,onlytoseetheseideasstolenandcopiedbyfast-fashioncompanies.
Inshort,thesedaysitseemsthatthefashionindustryischangingalmostasfastasthefashion
itproduces.Whatdoyouthinkofthis?
2.閱讀下面短文,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容寫一篇60詞左右的內(nèi)容概要。
Environmentalproblemsarebecomingmoreandmoreseriousallovertheworld.For
example,carshavemadetheairunhealthyfbrpeopletobreatheandpoisonousgasisgivenoffby
factories.Treesonthehillshavebeencutdownandwastewaterisbeingpouredcontinuouslyinto
rivers.Furthermore,whereverwegotoday,wecanfindrubbishcarelesslydisposed(處理).
Therearedifferentkindsofpollutants,eachofwhichcomesfromdifferentsources.Itis
necessarytoidentifythesourceofpollution,inordertomakeapolicytogetridofthem.Different
products,processesandactivitiesofourindustrializedworldtogetherformthemajorsourceof
pollution.
Theformsofpollutioncanbemainlydividedintothreekinds—solids,liquidandgas.These
pollutantshavegreatlydamagedourplanetandcontinuetodoso.Infact,pollutionisthreatening
ourexistence.Thewholeecologicalbalanceoftheearthischanging.Massivedestructionof
environmenthasbroughtaboutnegativeeffectsandevenposedagreatthreattoman'sexistence.
Wemustfacethesituationthatexistsandtakeactiontosolveourenvironmentalproblems.
Forinstance,newlawsmustbepassedtoplacestrictcontroloverindustrialpollution;thepublic
mustreceivetheeducationaboutthedangerofpollutionandraisetheirawarenessofprotecting
theenvironmentandsoon.
Theearthisourhomeandwehavethedutytotakecareofitfbrourselvesandourlater
generations.Fortunately,moreandmorepeoplehaverealizedtheseproblems.Measureshave
beentakentodealwiththesesituationsbythegovernment.Andlawshavebeenpassedtostop
pollution,Ihopetheproblemswillbesolvedinthenearfutureandourhomewillbecomebetter
andbetter.
3.概要寫作:閱讀下文,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容寫一篇50-60詞胡內(nèi)容概要。
Fordecades,doctorshavewarnedpatientsthattoomuchsaltcanbebadfortheheart.Heart
attackhaslongbeenconsideredagrown-upproblem,butnewresearchsuggeststhatsaltisstarting
toaffectchildren.Eatingtoomuchsaltyfoodwhenyou'reyoungcanleadtohealthproblems
later.
Saltismadeupoftwoelements:sodiumandchlorine.Dietaryguidelinesrecommendthat
adultsandkidsaged9-13shouldn'tconsumemorethanaboutateaspoonofsodiumdaily.The
averageAmericaneatstwicethisamount.Thisworriesdoctorsbecausetoomuchsodiumresultsin
thebodyproducingmoreblood.Topumptheextrablood,thehearthastoworkharder.This
causesariseinbloodpressure---ameasurementofhowstressedtheheartis.Highbloodpressure
oftenleadstoheartdisease.
Akidwithhighbloodpressureismorelikelytobecomeagrown-upwithhighbloodpressure.
Reducingsaltmightalsohelpstopchildhoodobesity.Britishresearchersrecentlyfoundthatkids
whoeatlesssaltalsodrinkfewersugaiysoftdrinks.Drinkingfewerfizzydrinksmakeskidsless
likelytogainweight,becomeobeseanddevelophighbloodpressure.
Saltcanaffectmorethanjustyourheartandweight.Arecentstudyfoundthatagrowing
numberofkidsintheUSaresufferingfromkidneystones.Thispainfulconditionusuallyaffects
peopleagedover40.Now,kidsasyoungasfivearegettingit.
Cuttingdownonsaltcanbehard,butyoucanretrainyourselftopreferlesssaltyfood.The
bestwaytoreducetheamountofsodiumyoueatistomakechangesgradually.Startbyadding
halfasmuchsalttoyourdinnerasyounormallydo.Switchtofreshfoodsinsteadofcannedand
bottledversions.Andgoeasyonthecondiments.Youmightalsowanttostartreadingnutrition
labels.Youmaybesurprisedtolearnthattherearel,150mgofsodiuminadoublecheeseburger,
andover2,000mginmanyfrozenmeals.
4.閱讀下面短文,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容寫一篇60詞左右的內(nèi)容概要。
Choosingtherightcollegecanbeadifficulttask.Therearethousandsofcollegesand
universitiesforyoutochoosefromandmanyareworthyofbeingconsidered.Foreachpotential
college,findoutthesuccessrateofstudents'gettingtheirjobs,especiallythoserelatedtoyour
majors.Herearesomestrategies(策略)foryoutomaketherightchoice.
Collegeswhichofferpracticeinsomeofthefieldsareworthyofyourattention.Itcan
provideyouwithalargeamountofinformationonjobhunting.Companiesoftenprefer
employeesthatperformwell.Practicegivesyouthevaluableexperienceandnecessary
opportunities.Somepracticalskillsthatyoulearnwillreallyprepareyourselfforthecertainjobs.
Besides,choosingacollegethathasteachermemberswithgoodreputationsintheirfieldscanalso
beveryusefulsincetheseteachermemberscanprovideyouwithstepsintotheworkingworldby
practice.
Schoolrankingsandanationalreputationofacademicsuccessareoftentheimportant
factors(因素)foryourpotentialemployers.Thistypeofinformationcanbefoundeasilyonthe
Internetandinmagazines.Totheemployers,graduatesfromhighrankingcollegesareoften
consideredmorereliable.Theyhaveastrongerabilitytoleamandaremorelikelytocreatewealth
forthecompany.Sometimesitcanevenbeamoreimportantfactorinlookingforajobthanthe
actualqualityofeducationthecollegeprovides.
Afternarrowingdownyourchoicestoafewcolleges,it'stimetovisitthem.Takingalookat
thecampus(校園)canchangeyourattitudetoaparticularschool.Planyourtourandthendosome
researchonyourown.Itisalsoimportanttotalktoasmanystudentsasyoucanandfindoutif
earningadegreefromtheschoolishelpfulingettingajob.Meanwhile,youcanspeaktothe
studentsinthemajorsyou'reconsideringtoknowwhatthecoursesarelike,whatyou'lllearn,and
whatyourexpectedoutcomewillbe.
5.閱讀下面短文,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容寫一篇60詞左右的內(nèi)容概要。
Artificialintelligence(AI)teacherscanprovidecustomizedteachingforstudentstomeettheir
uniquerequirementsthroughanalyzingdataanddeeplearning.Inthefuture,theymayreplace
humanteachersforbasicteachingtasks.Sincesomestudentsmayfinditandputnewpowerinto
traditionalteachingpattems.Aneducationalsystemprovidingcustomizedteachingcenteredon
studentsrepresentsthefuturetrendofAIeducation.
China'sAIeducationhasdevelopedrapidlyinrecentyearswiththeriseofseveralthousand
relevantcompanies.Currently,AIteachersareabletohelpstudentsleamnpronunciation,analyze
theircondition,guidethemtolearnindependently,andevengradewritingassignments.Some
foreignAIeducationalsystemshavebeenintroducedintoseveraldomesticschoolsandhave
workedwellontrial.
However,thepromotionofAIeducationisstillfacingseveraldifficultiesinpracticesuchas
lowtechnologicallevels,inadequacyofdataandlackoffunds.AIeducationstilldependslargely
onhumanteachers'work.Mostimportantly,itconflictswithcurrenteducationalpatternsbecause
thecoursesdevelopedbyforeigncountriesarenotsuitableforChineseexam-oriented
education.Teachersmayalsofindithardtochangetheiroriginalrolesinclassroomssinceeasing
controlonclassesmaymakethemseemirresponsible.Theseproblemsneedtobehandledbefore
themasspromotionofAleducation.
WithAIteachers,theoriginalteacher-centeredclasseswillbetransformedinto
student-centeredoneswhereteachersonlyorganizetheclassandprovideguidance.Sinceteachers
aresupposedtonotonlyequipstudentswithknowledgebutalsoshapetheirvaluesandhelpthem
developcreativeabilities,AIteacherswillnotreplacehumanteachersbutwillonlyposehigher
requirementsofteaching.AcombinationofAIteachersandhumanonescancreatethebestfuture
forAleducation.
答案與解析
1.【參考范文】
Nowadays,fastfashionhasshortenedthelifecycleofclothestofourweeks,whichmeansa
greatervolumeofsalesformanufacturersandcheaperandmorefashionableclothesforcustomers.
However,thewastedclothesduetothelowcostandmoreusageofchemicalscandogreatharm
totheenvironment.Besides,thetheftofdesignsisalsoaseriousproblemcausedbyfastfashion.
(65)
【解析】
寫作步驟
1)細(xì)讀原文。首先要仔細(xì)閱讀短文,掌握文章主旨。文章說明了如今,快時(shí)尚已經(jīng)將服
裝的生命周期縮短到四周,這對(duì)于制造商來(lái)說意味著更大的銷售量,對(duì)于消費(fèi)者來(lái)說意味著
更便宜更時(shí)尚的衣服。然而,由于低成本和更多的化學(xué)品的使用,浪費(fèi)的衣服可以對(duì)環(huán)境造
成很大的危害。此外,設(shè)計(jì)被盜也是快速時(shí)尚帶來(lái)的一個(gè)嚴(yán)重問題。
2)弄清結(jié)構(gòu),歸納段意。概要寫作是寫全文概要,不是寫某一部分的概要,或者就某些
問題寫出要點(diǎn)。因此一定要弄清文章結(jié)構(gòu),歸納文章各段大意。
3)列出原文要點(diǎn)。分析原文的內(nèi)容和結(jié)構(gòu),將內(nèi)容分項(xiàng)扼要表述并注意在結(jié)構(gòu)上的順序。
在此基礎(chǔ)上選出與文章主題密切相關(guān)的部分。
【范文點(diǎn)評(píng)】
本文描寫詳略得當(dāng),使用了高級(jí)詞匯和高級(jí)句子。如:shorten,lifecycle,agreatervolume
of等高級(jí)詞匯;Nowadays,fastfashionhasshortenedthelifecycleofclothestofourweeks,
whichmeansagreatervolumeofsalesformanufacturersandcheaperandmorefashionable
clothesforcustomers.非限制『性定語(yǔ)從句;Besides,thetheftofdesignsisalsoaseriousproblem
causedbyfastfashion.非謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞的運(yùn)用等高級(jí)句式。
2.【參考范文】
Theglobalenvironmentisbecomingworsebecauseofvariouspollutantsrelatedtothe
industrialworld.(要點(diǎn)1)Intheformsofgas,solidsandliquid,thesepollutantsarebecominga
majorthreattotheearthandhumansurvival.(要點(diǎn)2)Therefore,wehavetofaceitdirectlyand
sparenoefforttohandleit.(要點(diǎn)3)Luckily,peoplehavebeenawareoftheurgencyof
environmentalprotectionandthegovernmenthastakenactiontosolvetheseproblems,which
surelywillhelpmakeourearthbetter.(要點(diǎn)4)
【解析】
本篇書面表達(dá)是內(nèi)容概要。通過閱讀所給文章可知,本文是一篇環(huán)保主題的文章,內(nèi)容
完整,要點(diǎn)全面,語(yǔ)言規(guī)范,語(yǔ)篇連貫,上下文意思連貫,符合邏輯關(guān)系。
"Environmentalproblemsarebecomingmoreandmoreseriousallovertheworld."第一段第
一句開篇點(diǎn)題,點(diǎn)出世界各地的環(huán)境問題越來(lái)越嚴(yán)重。"Therearedifferentkindsofpollutants,
eachofwhichcomesfromdifferentsources.,,uTheformsofpollutioncanbemainlydividedinto
threekinds-solids,liquidandgas."第二、三段將污染形式進(jìn)行分類,分為固體、液體和氣
體三種?!癟heearthisourhomeandwehavethedutytotakecareofitforourselvesandourlater
generations.,H4Measureshavebeentakentodealwiththesesituationsbythegovernment.”最后點(diǎn)
出地球是我們的家園,我們有責(zé)任為我們自己和我們的后代去照顧它。并且人們已經(jīng)在不斷
地努力。
即總結(jié)可根據(jù)此結(jié)構(gòu)分為四點(diǎn)來(lái)總結(jié):由于與工業(yè)世界有關(guān)的各種污染物,全球環(huán)境正
變得越來(lái)越惡劣。(要點(diǎn)1)在氣體、固體和液體的形式中,這些污染物正成為對(duì)地球和人類
生存的主要威脅。(要點(diǎn)2)因此,我們必須直接面對(duì)它,(要點(diǎn)3)很幸運(yùn),人們已經(jīng)意識(shí)到環(huán)
境保護(hù)的緊迫性,政府已經(jīng)采取行動(dòng)來(lái)解決這些問題,這必將有助于改善我們的地球。(要
點(diǎn)4)
【范文點(diǎn)評(píng)】
英文文章一般在每一段的首句和尾句會(huì)點(diǎn)明段落主旨大意。進(jìn)行文章總結(jié)的時(shí)候,應(yīng)重
點(diǎn)關(guān)注各段落的首位句的大意,并進(jìn)行總結(jié)提要,按照邏輯關(guān)系進(jìn)行總結(jié)。
3.【參考范文】
Eatingtoomuchsalthashealthrisksforchildrensuchascausinghighbloodpressure,heart
problems,obesityandkidneystones.Butthereareseveralwaystocutdownonsalt.Childrencan
reducetheamountofsalttheyusuallyusebyhalf.Theyshouldeatfreshfoodsandreducethe
condimentstheyaddtofood.Finally,theyshouldchecktheamountofsaltinfoodbyreading
nutritionlabels.
【解析】
概要寫作首先要通讀全文內(nèi)容,通曉文章大意;然后提煉語(yǔ)言;最后用高度概括性的句
子表達(dá)出全文內(nèi)容。本文主要寫出三點(diǎn):一、太多的鹽(主要是鈉)攝入會(huì)導(dǎo)致三個(gè)方面的健
康問題:高血壓、肥胖、心臟病和腎結(jié)石,二、主要講到對(duì)孩子的危害。三、提出了解決辦
法,主要是逐步減少攝入、多吃新鮮食品、多看食品營(yíng)養(yǎng)標(biāo)簽。結(jié)合三個(gè)要點(diǎn)即可寫出本概
要。
【范文點(diǎn)評(píng)】
本文要點(diǎn)齊全,語(yǔ)言概括性強(qiáng),文中使用了Eatingtoomuchsalt動(dòng)名詞短語(yǔ)作主語(yǔ);
Theyshouldeatfreshfoodsandreducethecondimentstheyaddtofood.本句是and連接的并列
句,theyaddtofood是定語(yǔ)從句,that引導(dǎo)(作賓語(yǔ)可省略)。
4.【參考范文】
Challengingasitistochooseanidealcollege,they'resometipsthatmayhelp.(要點(diǎn)1)First,
collegesthatprovidepracticeandhavedistinguishedteachersincertainfieldsareworth
considering.(要點(diǎn)2)Second,it'sadvisabletosearchforacademicrankingsandreputation,which
yourfutureemployersmaycareabout.(要點(diǎn)3)Afteryouhavecandidates,visitthemandenquire
moreofrelatedstudents.(要點(diǎn)4)
【解析】
這是一篇議論文,文章就如何選擇一個(gè)好的大學(xué)給出幾點(diǎn)建議。
第一步:概括每個(gè)段落的大意
第一段主要說明了選擇一個(gè)理想的大學(xué)是一個(gè)挑戰(zhàn),會(huì)影響到未來(lái)的工作,所以作者給出幾
點(diǎn)選擇大學(xué)的建議。可以用Challengingasitistochooseanidealcollege,there^esometipsthat
mayhelp.表示。
第二段給出第一個(gè)建議,第一句就給出了主旨句子Collegeswhichofferpracticeinsomeofthe
fieldsareworthyofyourattention提供實(shí)踐經(jīng)驗(yàn)的大學(xué)值得考慮,后文又說到choosinga
collegethathasteachermemberswithgoodreputationsintheirfieldscanalsobeveryuseful,選
擇一個(gè)有好的老師,老師的名聲不錯(cuò)的學(xué)校也是有用的。即collegesthatprov
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