Polish the Writing

1、 How to Polish the Composition -Culture and Communication汕頭市第一中學(xué) 劉立爽Writing Task 假如你是李華，你校下個月將組織學(xué)生代表團(tuán)前往英國的姐妹學(xué)校The Willink School參觀交流。學(xué)?，F(xiàn)在面向全體學(xué)生挑選合適人選，你對此很感興趣。請寫一封申請信，向負(fù)責(zé)該活動的外籍教師Mr. John申請參加。內(nèi)容包括：1. 自我介紹(包括英語能力)；2. 參加意圖(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化,了解英國文化)；3. 希望獲準(zhǔn)。審題：Tense Information Person StyleTense：present(mainly)

2、InformationPerson: from you (Li Hua) to foreign teacher(Mr. John)Style: An Application Letter1. 自我介紹(包括英語能力)；2. 參加意圖(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化,了解英國文化)；3. 希望獲準(zhǔn)。 團(tuán)前往英國的姐妹學(xué)校The Willink School參觀交流。你校下個月將組織學(xué)生代表 感興趣。Outline: 簡單介紹 + 背景 + 寫作目的自我介紹（優(yōu)勢）+ 參加意圖希望獲準(zhǔn)Para.1:Para.2:Para.3:Evaluate three compositions according to

3、the assessment table.Compare them and present your ideas:What are their advantages and disadvantages? How much score will you give them?Evaluation & Comparisoncontain all the informationnot detailedsome spelling& grammar mistakes15some mistakes & too many simple sentencesadd some details18detailedva

4、rious expressionsgood sentence patterns 21Characteristics of a good writingcontain all the informationbe to the pointadd proper detailsfew mistakesvarious expressionsgood sentence patternslinking wordsin a logical wayNeat and tidycontentlanguagecoherencehandwritingPolishing (content) To polish our c

5、omposition, we need to: Focus on CONTENT Focus on LANGUAGE Focus on COHERENCE Focus on HANDWRITINGPolishing (content) 參加意圖(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化；了解英國文化) I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture. I also want to know more about British culture.Task:I would like you to add some details to enrich th

6、e content in your handout.If you finish it, discuss with your partners what you have added.Polishing (content) 參加意圖(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化；了解英國文化) I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture. I also want to know more about British culture.1. I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture to

7、 spread its gorgeous spirits to the foreign friends. 增加目的技法一：Polishing (content) 參加意圖(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化；了解英國文化) I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture. I also want to know more about British culture.2. I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture because China is such a great co

8、untry with brilliant cultural heritage.增加原因技法二：Polishing (content) 參加意圖(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化；了解英國文化) I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture. I also want to know more about British culture.3. I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture, especially the traditional folk arts Peking O

9、pera and paper-cutting.內(nèi)容具體化技法三： Polishing (content) 參加意圖(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化；了解英國文化) I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture. I also want to know more about British culture. Chinese culture has so many forms.e.g. paper-cutting; Peking Opera; Chinese Kungfu; calligraphy; Tang poemsPolishing (

10、content) 參加意圖(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化；了解英國文化) I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture, such as Peking opera and paper-cutting for the purpose of spreading our brilliant cultural heritage to our foreign friends. Besides, really interested in British culture, I am eager to know more about it in per

11、son, especially to have a glimpse of their local customs.Polishing (content) 參加意圖(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化；了解英國文化) I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture, such as Peking opera and paper-cutting for the purpose of spreading our brilliant cultural heritage to our foreign friends. Besides, really in

12、terested in British culture, I am eager to know more about it in person, especially to have a glimpse of their local customs.具體化Polishing (content) 參加意圖(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化；了解英國文化) I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture, such as Peking opera and paper-cutting for the purpose of spreading our

13、 brilliant cultural heritage to our foreign friends. Besides, really interested in British culture, I am eager to know more about it in person, especially to have a glimpse of their local customs.目的具體化Polishing (content) 參加意圖(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化；了解英國文化) I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture

14、, such as Peking opera and paper-cutting for the purpose of spreading our brilliant cultural heritage to our foreign friends. Besides, really interested in British culture, I am eager to know more about it in person, especially to have a glimpse of their local customs.原因目的具體化Polishing (content) 參加意圖

15、(介紹中國優(yōu)秀傳統(tǒng)文化；了解英國文化) I would like to introduce our excellent Chinese culture, such as Peking opera and paper-cutting for the purpose of spreading our brilliant cultural heritage to our foreign friends. Besides, really interested in British culture, I am eager to know more about it in person, especial

16、ly to have a glimpse of their local customs.原因目的具體化具體化Summary (content) What techniques can we use to polish the content by adding some proper details?增加目的技法一：增加原因技法二：內(nèi)容具體化技法三：Summary (content) What techniques can we use to polish the content by adding some proper details?增加目的技法一：增加原因技法二：內(nèi)容具體化技法三：Po

17、lishing (language)To polish our composition, we need to: Focus on CONTENT Focus on LANGUAGE Focus on COHERENCE Focus on HANDWRITINGPolishing (language) 技法一：分詞結(jié)構(gòu)I heard that our school is choosing students to go to Willink School next month. So I am writing to apply for the chance. _(分詞表原因), I am wri

18、ting to apply for the chance. Having heard that our school is choosing students to go to Willink School next monthPolishing (language) 2. I have a good command of English. I can communicate with foreign students in English fluently. _(分詞 表原因), I can communicate with foreign students in English fluen

19、tly. With _(with結(jié)構(gòu)表原因), I can communicate with foreign students in English fluently.Having a good command of Englisha good command of English技法二：with結(jié)構(gòu)Polishing (language) 2. I have a good command of English. I can communicate with the foreign students in English fluently. 技法三：定語從句I have a good comm

20、and of English, which_enables me to communicate with foreign students in English fluently.Polishing (language) 3. I speak English fluently. I have no difficulty in communicating with foreign students.技法四：強(qiáng)調(diào)句_ makes me have no difficulty in communicating with foreignstudents.It is my fluent English t

21、hat Polishing (language) 4. I am so outgoing that I can easily make friends with foreign students. So outgoing am I that I can easily make friends with foreign students. I speak English so fluently that I will have no difficulty in communicating with them. So fluently do I speak English that I will

22、have no difficulty in communicating with them. 技法五：活用倒裝Summary (language) 技法四：強(qiáng)調(diào)句技法一：分詞結(jié)構(gòu)技法二：with結(jié)構(gòu)技法 三：定語從句 What techniques can we use to polish the language?技法五：活用倒裝Polishing (coherence)To polish our composition, we need to:Focus on CONTENTFocus on LANGUAGEFocus on COHERENCEFocus on HANDWRITINGPol

23、ishing (coherence) I have a good command of English. So outgoing am I that I can easily make friends with the foreign students. I want to introduce Chinese culture to British students. I am eager to know more about British culture. No linking words!Not logical and coherent!Polishing (coherence) _, I

24、 have a good command of English. _, so outgoing am I that I can easily make friends with the foreign students. _, I want to introduce Chinese culture to British students. _, I am eager to know more about British culture. Additionally To begin with At the same time If I can be selectedABCDA cohesive

25、marker can be a word, a phrase or even a short sentence for transition選擇最佳選項(xiàng)填入空白處，使文段更加連貫。Polishing (Handwriting)To polish our composition, we need to:Focus on CONTENTFocus on LANGUAGEFocus on COHERENCEFocus on HANDWRITINGPolishing (Handwriting) Neat and tidy handwriting can contribute a lot to your

26、 score! One possible version:Dear John, I am Li Hua. Having learnt that our schoolis selecting appropriate representatives to be the exchange students next month, I am writing to apply for it. I think I am a suitable candidate. To begin with, with a good command of English, I can communicate with foreignstudents in English fluently. Moreover, so outgoi