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閱讀下面短文,根據(jù)所給情節(jié)進(jìn)行續(xù)寫,使之構(gòu)成一個(gè)完整的故事Themostdelightfulandunusualthing[paidforinthelastsummerwasapairofducklings.OnedayIspottedafriend'sphotooftwotinygoldenducklingsinherlivingroom.Imessagedherimmediately.Shewasfostering(照#)thebabyducksforafarm.Asthefarmexplainsonitswebsite,youcanadoptthenewbornsandparentthemuntiltheygrowintotheir“adulthood”whenyoucouldchoosetokeepthemortakethemback.For$165,thefarmwouldbringuseverythingweneededtofosterducklingsandalsoanactivityforLeo.Thisprogramwouldprovideuswithwhatwe'dbeenlacking:joyandfellowship.“We'regettingducklings!”Iproudlyannounced.About10dayslater,amanfromthefarmarrivedatourhomeandhandedoverashoeboxhousingapairofbabyducks.LeoandIheldtheminourhands,eachoneatiny,almostweightlessparcelofsilkygold.Leoimmediatelycasthimselfastheirfather,andtheducklingsacceptedtherolehappilywaddling(搖擺)athisfeetandslippingonourhardwoodfloors.Leokissedthemontheirbeaks(喙)andtheybithislipslightly,whichheconcludedmeanttheylovedhim.Afterafewweeks,theducklingstripledinsize,andthefairytaletookaturn.Muchaswelovedthem,itwastimetomakethechoice.Theywereabouttoenteradulthood,anditwasgettinginconvenienttokeepthemanylonger.ltwasonlythenthatIrealizedIdidn'tknowwhatwouldhappentothembackatthefarm.Icalledthefarm,andIwastoldthatactuallyourducklingswouldlikelyserveaswonderfulsupper.”注意:1.所續(xù)寫短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右:2.續(xù)寫部分分為兩段,每段的開頭語已為你寫好Paragraph1.Now,wecouldn'tkeepthem,butwealsocouldn'ttakethemback.Paragraph2:IwaslosinghopewhenIreceivedanemailfromawomanwholivedonahobbyfarm.原文大意:

我看到朋友分享的在家養(yǎng)小鴨子的可愛照片,也想通過鴨子寵物收獲開心和友誼,于是聯(lián)系農(nóng)場(chǎng)領(lǐng)養(yǎng)了兩只剛出生ducklings,農(nóng)場(chǎng)承諾等小鴨長(zhǎng)大你可以選擇繼續(xù)養(yǎng)或者送回農(nóng)場(chǎng)。我和Leo都很喜歡這兩個(gè)小家伙,可隨著他們的長(zhǎng)大,我們已經(jīng)不方便再繼續(xù)養(yǎng)下去,于是詢問農(nóng)場(chǎng)送回之后鴨子會(huì)怎樣被對(duì)待?得知鴨子會(huì)成為盤中餐。。。接下來,要我們續(xù)寫??蚣芊治觯?/p>

根據(jù)第一段的首句Now,wecouldn’tkeepthem,butwealsocouldn’ttakethemback.可知,情感是糾結(jié)的兩難的。那該怎么解決呢?所以接下來寫how.再看第二段給的首句IwaslosinghopewhenIreceivedanemailfromawomanwholivedonahobbyfarm.中的關(guān)鍵詞“anemail”,倒推出第一段中的解決辦法應(yīng)該是網(wǎng)上求助(或發(fā)帖或論壇或發(fā)郵件等方式)。第二段后面續(xù)寫內(nèi)容就自然是發(fā)郵件來的這位女性收養(yǎng)我們的鴨子,我們把鴨子送去她的農(nóng)場(chǎng)。細(xì)節(jié)分析:

三個(gè)銜接處分析完,框架也就出來了,再來看細(xì)節(jié)和伏筆。細(xì)節(jié)一:第二段給出的首句中waslosinghope這一細(xì)節(jié)暗示第一段結(jié)尾處的解決辦法應(yīng)該并非很順利,所以我第一段結(jié)尾處寫的是:Aweekpassed,andtherewasnomoreresponse.這樣和第二段首句waslosinghope這一細(xì)節(jié)銜接更緊湊。細(xì)節(jié)二:我也再次利用第二段首句losehope這一詞,在第一段網(wǎng)上求助時(shí)寫到

Withthehopethatitwouldwork,Iposted...,這樣兩處的hope形成呼應(yīng)。細(xì)節(jié)三:第二段首句中的hobbyfarm,是和其他農(nóng)場(chǎng)不一樣的。農(nóng)場(chǎng)主應(yīng)該是動(dòng)物愛好者(范文寫的是素食主義者),不會(huì)讓鴨子成為盤中餐。于是,第二段我描寫了這個(gè)農(nóng)場(chǎng)里動(dòng)物生活舒適和諧的畫面,“我”放心把鴨子交給了她。細(xì)節(jié)四:最后結(jié)尾再看看有沒有主題可以升華?;氐皆牡谝欢谓Y(jié)尾句提到我們養(yǎng)鴨子是期望收獲我們?nèi)狈Φ膉oyandfellowship,我把這個(gè)定位為主題,想在續(xù)寫結(jié)尾重復(fù)升華下,于是第二段我寫到hobby農(nóng)場(chǎng)主讓我們隨時(shí)可以回來看望鴨子。我的結(jié)尾Infact,joyandfellowshipcanstaywithusforever.也就自然點(diǎn)題了。下水文:Now,wecouldn'tkeepthem,butwealsocouldn'ttakethemback.Trappedinsuchadilemma,IfeltatalosswhatIshoulddo.ThenLeosuggested,“Whynotturntothesocialmediaforhelp?”Withthehopethatitwouldwork,Ipostedonlinephotosofmyducklingsanddesiredtofindsomeonewillingtofosterthem.Itturnedoutthatmypostdidreceiveseveralviewersandcomments,onlyshowingaffectionforourlovelyducksbuttheycouldn'tkeepthemeither.Aweekpassed,andtherewasnomoreresponse.IwaslosinghopewhenIreceivedanemailfromawomanwholivedonahobbyfarm.“l(fā)amananimalloveranditisconvenientformetoadoptthemonmyfarmandyoucandropinonthemwheneveryouwant.”Withasurgeofexcitementsweepingoverme,ItogetherwithLeotookalongourduckstoherfarm.ThewomannamedMarygaveusawarmwelcomeandshowedusaroundherfarm,hometovariouslivestock,livingfreelyandharmoniouslytogether.Aswesaidgoodbye.wecouldn'twaittoseeeachothernexttime.Infact,joyandfellowshipcanstaywithusforever.附:參考范文No,wecouldn'thelpthem,butitalsocouldn'ttakethemback.Whatadilemma!Allthistime,wehadbeenfosteringthemoutoflove,hadn'twe?Orhadwebeenfatteningthemforafancymealindeed?NeverdidIimaginethatthejoyandfellowshipwehadwouldcometoabrutalbreakup.Plus,Ididn'thavethehearttotellLeotoacceptsuchamiserablefateforhisbelovedducklings.Dreadfullyguilty,Ilaunchedasortofduckadoptionagency,desperatelyemailingandcallinganimalsheltersinthehopeoffindingthemasafehome.IaslosinghopethenIreceivedanemailfromawomanwholivedonahobbyfarm.Shewaslookingformoreducks,andshewasvegetarian,whichmadeheraperfectcandidate.Wecarefullypackedeverythingforourducksbeforeheadingtotheirnewhome.Asweenteredthehobbyfarm,Ifeltasifwehadslippedintoafairytale:bunnieshoppingaroundsunlitgrass,miniaturehorsestrottingontherichpasture,andgrown-upduckswanderingaboutwiththeirwhichfeathersdancingagainstsummerclouds.Reluctantandrejoicedatthesametime,weleftoutducksforthisdreamhouse.反思:下水文和范文的對(duì)比學(xué)習(xí)拜讀了范文,框架和思路和范文大致相同,說明下水文分析方向是沒有錯(cuò)的。這篇下

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