破產(chǎn)姐妹 雙語劇本 第一季 第2集

一直想為每部美劇做一份筆記,一直想鼓勵每個美劇迷讀一點劇本,做一點筆記.破產(chǎn)姐妹第一季第二集感謝人人影視提供字幕,Hi,readytoorder?準備好點餐了嗎Doyouhaveanythingthat'sreallyspecial?你們有什么特色[菜]說來聽聽Notaccordingtomyhighschoolguidancecounselor.我高中輔導員說我沒有特色I'llhavetheveggieplate.那我要個蔬菜拼盤Butinsteadofbeets,Iwantkale.不要甜菜換甘藍Andinsteadofbroccoli,morekale.不要花椰菜再放點甘藍Iwanttheveggiessteamed.蔬菜要用蒸的Andinsteadofdressing,Iwantlemons.色拉調(diào)料改用檸檬代替Don'tyouneedtowritethisdown?你怎么還不動筆記下來啊I'mafraidifIstartwritingthatdown,現(xiàn)在只有心情寫遺書it'llturnintoasuicidenote.因為要被煩死了I'massumingthistable'sgonnahavealotmoreofthoserequests.我猜你們都會這么點餐吧Yes,Icouldtellbythehats.沒錯看你們那帽就知道是事兒精本字幕由YYeTs人人影視原創(chuàng)翻譯制作■僅供學習禁止用于任何商業(yè)盈利行為更多影視更新請登陸www.YYeT姐妹花打工第一季第二集姐妹花打工第一季第二集\h翻譯關你屁事YY貓\h翻譯關你屁事YY貓\h校對關你鳥事賽太公\h校對關你鳥事賽太公后期魚骨頭\h后期魚骨頭\h\h時間軸總監(jiān)關你屁事YY貓時間軸總監(jiān)關你屁事YY貓\hEarl,IhavesomethingnewIwantyoutotry.厄爾我有新東西想你嘗嘗That'stheexactsamesentence正是因為這句話thatgotmehookedoncocaineinthe'80s.我才會在幾十年前染上吸毒的惡習It'smynewcupcakeflavor.我說的是蛋糕的新口味啦Deliciousdarkchocolatetheladiescan'thelpbutlove.女人無法抗拒的美味黑巧克力口味I'mcallingit"TheEarl."我把它稱為"黑伯爵厄爾"Iknowyougotthatright.說得好Hi,I'mhere.我來了IwasrunninglatesoIdecidedtohailacab.本來我以為要遲到了想說打個的吧AndthenIrememberedIdidn'thaveanymoneyonme.然后才想起我沒帶錢AndthenIrememberedIdidn'thaveanymoneyatall.接著意識到我現(xiàn)在是兩袖清風的窮光蛋SoIwalkedthewholewayhere.所以我不辭辛苦地走來上班Theapartment'sthreeblocksaway.我家到這里才隔三條街Yes,Iknow.我知道Threeblocksand15"holachicas"away.三條街外加十五聲"喲呵妹子"那么遠Well,youcan'tbelateagain.你不能再遲到了I'malreadyworriedaboutmebeinglate...我夠煩我每個月遲到的...everymonth.大姨媽了Onmywayhere,ahomelessmanaskedmeformoney.在我來的路上一位無家可歸的流浪漢向我討錢AndItoldhimthatIusuallyalwaysgive,我跟他說通常我都會慷慨解囊butthatmyfatherwasindictedinaPonziscandal但我的父親因為非法斂財而被起訴了andI'velostmyfamilyfortuneandmyManhattantownhouse,我們家產(chǎn)沒了曼哈頓豪宅也沒了soI'vebeensleepingonacouchinBrooklyn,but,還得在布魯克林區(qū)朋友家的沙發(fā)過夜inspiteofitall,I'mstilloptimistic盡管世事無常但我還是對于thatyouandIwillachievesuccess開小蛋糕店持樂觀態(tài)度inourexcitingnewcupcakebusinessventure.并堅信未來將會取得成功Andlookwhathegaveme!瞧看他給了我啥Youtookmoneyfromahomelessman?你連流浪漢的錢都拐啊IprefertothinkofBobnearthebridgeasourfirstinvestor.應該說是橋邊的鮑勃入股投資才對Pickup!Specialsandwich.上菜特制三明治Icanthinkofevenmorespecialsandwich.我還想到一種更妙的三明治You,meandthehotblondegiraffe.你我金發(fā)長頸鹿夾一起Well,sherecentlylostherdignity,她破產(chǎn)后尊嚴全沒了soyoumighthaveashot.搞不好她會愿意屈就Hellotoday!今天好啊Ihavenametagforyou.我給你做了個名牌Onlyyourseconddayandlook,nametagalready.你才來第二天我就給你備好名牌了Asnewowner,Iamkillingit.這新東家當?shù)奶１屏薚hankyou.謝謝Oh,itsays"Carolin."上面寫的是"卡洛淋"It'sCaroline.Withan"E".我叫卡洛"琳"是"王"字旁I'mCaroline.我叫卡洛琳Asnewowner,Iamsuckingit.這新東家當?shù)奶屏薐ustputiton.你就掛著就是了Youcan'ttellanAsianhemadeamistake.不能告訴亞洲人他犯了錯誤He'llgointhebackandthrowhimselfonasword.不然等會他就去拔劍自刎了Thankyou,Mr.Lee.謝謝你李老板YoumaycallmeHan.你可以叫我憨H-a-n.勇"敢"的"心"Notrapinmyname.好記不會錯I'mthinkingweshouldtake我在想我們可以邁出thefirststepinournewcupcakebusiness我們蛋糕事業(yè)的第一步了bywriting"Max'sHomemadeCupcakes"就在優(yōu)惠餐板上uponthespecialsboard.寫上"麥克斯自制蛋糕"吧No,Ican'thavemynameupthere.不行姐的大名不能張揚EveryoneIowemoneytothinksIliveinSeattle.我的債主們都以為我住在西雅圖呢Oh,weusedtoownSeattle.哎以前西雅圖是我家的呢Max,we'vegottogetthenameoutthere.麥克斯你的名字一定得亮相Createabuzz.制造名氣嘛Ooh,goodidea!好棒好棒Let'screateabuzz.趕緊開始名氣大作戰(zhàn)Exactly,inordertolaunch--沒錯要想打開市場I'mmockingyou.我是在模仿你那傻樣兒Whenindoubt,I'malwaysmockingyou.以后別懷疑我向來都是在嘲笑你Seriously,Max.說真的麥克斯Thisnewcupcakebusinessisourlifeline.這個蛋糕事業(yè)是我們的救生索Awayoutforbothofus.能助我們走上脫貧致富的道路呀AndIwannathankyouagainforlettingmemovein.我還想再次感謝你讓我搬進你家住Ifthere'sanythingIcandotohelpyou--如果有任何事我能幫得上忙的Youmeanbesidesstartingtowaitontables?是指除了招待客人以外的忙嗎Imeant,anythingIcandotohelpyou我是說任何能幫你平復throughyourbreakupwithRobbie.和羅比分手的難過心情的事Oh.Thanks,butI'mfine.謝了我沒事Andwe'reworking.而且現(xiàn)在是我們工作時間Well,oneofusis.你不干活我還干呢Areyousureyou'refine?你確定你沒事嗎'CauseIheardyoucryinglastnight.昨晚我聽見你在哭Idon'tcry.我才不哭Isoldmytearductstoanorganbankforcashtwoyearsago.早在兩年前我就把淚腺拿去器官銀行賣錢了Iwasonthecouch.當時我躺在沙發(fā)上AndIheardyoucryingaloneinyourbedroom.聽到你在臥室里獨自啜泣Really?Whatdidthecryingsoundlike?真的嗎那哭聲聽起來像啥樣Like...像這樣...Iwasn'tcrying.我不是在哭Well,thenwhatwereyoud--那你是在干嘛...Oh!Sononeofmybusiness.哎喲那事我管不著That'sright.正確-Andrememberthat.-Gotit.-麻煩記住這點-收到Infact,let'sjustsaythatanythinghavingtodo事實上任何有關于withmybedroom,mytables,ormylife--我臥室我桌子或我生活的事youshouldstayawayfrom.你最好都別多管閑事Boundaries.Gotit.界限明白Andpleasedon'ttellanyoneatwork而且千萬不要告訴任何同事Iletyoumoveintomyapartment.我讓你搬進我家住Thatisoneboundarywebothdon'twantcrossed.一說出去后果難以想象Why?為什么Hey,roomies.嗨同居"蜜"友That'swhy.懂了吧Hopethosesheetsareokay.希望你能睡得慣這床單Oh,don'tworryaboutit.不用擔心Iknowthey'rethebestyoucouldafford.我知道你就只能買這么好的了Notreally.Thegoodonesareonmybed.其實不是更好的我自己用著呢Max,thatovenissohot.麥克斯烤箱太熱了Couldyoudomeafavorandopenthebackdoor?你能幫我開開后門嗎We'veknowneachothertwodays我們才認識兩天andyou'realreadyaskingforbackdoor?你就想開我"后庭"啊DearGod!上帝呀Iforgotyou'reEquestrianBarbie.我忘了你是騎師芭比Youcamewithahorse.買芭比還附贈馬一只No.不行Out,horse,bad!Badhorse.出去小馬不乖哦大壞馬Chestnut.栗寶Noneedtoyell,he'sachampion.沒必要嚷它它可是冠軍馬Championstinkbomb.米田共臭度也是冠軍It'ssmellingprettyripeoutinthatyard.整個院子臭味四溢That'snotChestnut,that'sBrooklyn.這不關栗寶的事布魯克林本來就這味兒Okay,well,I'mwatching"TheChampion"好吧我現(xiàn)在就看見"冠軍馬"dropsomesteaminghot"Brooklyn"rightnow.拉出幾坨熱氣騰騰的"布魯克林"呢Max,I'vebeenthinkingabouthowyoucompletelyoverreacted麥克斯對于把名字寫在板子上這件事toyournameuponthespecialsboard.我覺得你有點反應過大了Doyouthinkit'safearofsuccess?你覺得那是對成功的恐懼嗎Iamtoopoortohaveafearofsuccess.我窮到恐懼不起成功AtWhartonBusinessSchool,welearned我在沃頓商學院學過thateverynewventurecanbringupacertainamountoffear.但凡創(chuàng)業(yè)都會伴隨著一定的恐懼IsthereanywaytodoayelpreviewofWhartonBusinessSchool?Yelp美國最大點評網(wǎng)站我能去Yelp網(wǎng)上給沃頓點個差評之類的嗎Maybeyou'rehavingahardtimeimagining或許因為沒人相信過你和你的夢想thiscupcakebusinesscouldeverevenhappen所以你才無法想象becausenobodyeverbelievedinyouoryourdreams.這個蛋糕事業(yè)會有實現(xiàn)的一天I'mguessing.我瞎猜的Icanmakethishappen,Max.我能幫你美夢成真麥克斯Forme,foryou,forus.為了我為了你為了我們Justkeepmakingthoseamazingcupcakes.你就接著烘焙超好吃的小蛋糕AndI'lldotheresttillyoubelieve.其他我來做做到你相信為止Ibelieveeverythingyoujustsaid我"相信"你說的每一句話andthatchildrenarethefuture.我也"相信"孩子是未來的主人翁Max,it'sme!麥克斯是我Iknowit'syou.我知道是你Yousleepwithaknifeunderyourpillow?你睡覺時枕頭底下還藏把刀啊It'stheonlyhomesecuritysystemIcanafford.這是我唯一付得起的家庭安保項目AndI'macutter.而且割腕兒童歡樂多嘛Ican'tsleeponthatcouch.那沙發(fā)我睡不了IthinkIkeamightbetheScandinavianwordforsciatica.我想"宜家"是脊椎"移架"的意思吧Andthere'sweirdsoundsinthestreet.而且大街上有奇怪的聲音AndIdon'thavemywhitenoisemachine.我也沒帶助眠白噪音機Well,that'sPuertoRicannoise.只是波多黎各街頭藝人在瞎吹奏嘛You'llgetusedtoit.你聽聽就會習慣CanIjustlaydownhereandgetalittlesleep?我能躺在這睡一會兒嗎Idon'tevenletthemenIsleepwithsleepwithme.我的男人都不準在這睡Ican'tgetintoyourissuesrightnow.你的心里毛病我現(xiàn)在沒力醫(yī)Ijustneedtosleep!我只是想睡覺Fine,getinthen.好吧鉆進來吧Whatisthat?這是什么Potatochips.Isleep-eat.薯片我邊睡邊吃Coolranchandbacon?清涼牧場培根味Dude,they'redelicious.拜托好吃到做夢也會笑BecauseofyourbreakupwithRobbie?跟人分手就得自暴自棄嗎Justgetin.少廢話快上來Ihavetobeinthecitytobabysitinfivehours.我五個小時后得去市里給人看孩子呢Oh,great,you'relikeanightlight.天啊你就像盞燈You'resoblonde.金發(fā)亮得真晃眼Thankyou.多謝夸獎Max,someone'sinthelivingroom.麥克斯有人進了客廳Max,someone'sinthebedroom!麥克斯有人進了臥室Robbie!羅比What'sup,babe?怎么了寶貝Robbie,whatareyoudoinghere?羅比你來這兒干嘛Webrokeup.我們已經(jīng)分手了Still?還分著啊Yes,still.Youhitonme.沒錯還分著你調(diào)戲我Andthenshecaughtyouwithsomeoneelse然后她還發(fā)現(xiàn)你和別人intheseverysheets.在這張床上滾床單WhichI'mhopingshewashed.希望你洗過這床單了Oh,Igetit.我懂了Youblewmeoff'causeyouliketheladies.你跟我分手是因為你喜歡女人Whichiscool.Iliketheladies,too.沒關系我也喜歡女人Andrightnow,it'sthetwoladiesIlike.而現(xiàn)在床上的兩個女人我都喜歡Robbie,ifIweregonnagolesbian,羅比如果我要玩百合情shewouldbethelast"les"I'd"bian."她是我最不可能"合"的那位Listen,babe--聽我說寶貝Youreallyhurther.你傷她很深Stop.閉嘴Shesleep-eatstransfatsthankstoyou.都是你弄的她邊睡邊吃垃圾食品Here,stuffalloftheseinyourmouth.給把這些都塞進你嘴巴里Gotit,yourthing.I'llbequiet.收到你的事我閉嘴就是了Robbie,thisisn'tcoolatall.羅比這樣是不對的Showinguphereafterwhatyoudid?你都做出那種事了怎么還有臉回來Yougo,girl.說得好姐妹Ihavesomethingtosaytoyouandyouhadbetterlisten.我說的話你最好給我聽清楚Whatareyou,therelationshipghost?你這算什么戀情背后靈嗎Robbie,justgo!羅比你走吧Ican'tsaywhatIneedtoinfrontoftherelationshipghost.在戀情背后靈面前事請不好談I'llcallyoutocomegetyourstuff我會打電話叫你來拿東西andwecantalkthen.到時候再談吧Leavethekey.把鑰匙留下Straightup,Max,you'rebreakingmyheart.坦白說麥克斯你傷了我的心You'retheonlywomanthatIfeelthiswayabout.你是我唯一深愛的女人Here.給Ladies,Idon'tknowwhat'sgoingonhere,女士們我不知道你們倆在搞啥butitwould'vebeenalotsexierifIwasinit.要是有我一定更高潮迭起Areyouokay?你沒事吧Ifyouwannatalk,I'mhere.如果你想傾訴我就在這兒CanIgetahitoffthat?我能嘗一口嗎Youthinkthesearegood?你覺得這就算好吃嗎God,we'repoor.天啊我們真窮Morning!早安It'sabeautifulday.真是美好的一天Theseshadesbelongdown.這些簾子的職責就是遮擋陽光Fromnowon,thinkofmeasavampire從現(xiàn)在開始把我當作withoutalltheannoyingmarketing.不用看我行銷的吸血鬼Badnews.壞消息Apipebrokeinthestreetsothewater'soff.這街的水管壞了所以今天斷水Goodnews,whenIwentouttogetustwocoffees,好消息是我出去給咱倆買咖啡時IspoketoJuanandJavier,twocityworkers.兩個市政工人胡安和哈維爾告訴我Andtheyassuredmethewater'llbeonnolaterthan3:00.最晚下午三點就會恢復供水Ialsostoppedatthehealthfoodstore我還去健康食品店andgotusafresh-squeezedjuicetosplit.給咱倆買了一杯鮮榨果汁來分著喝It'sginger-apple-strawberry.是生姜蘋果草莓味的哦Thatwasthenameofthehooker這屋子上一位租客的whohadthisapartmentbeforeme.賣淫藝名就是這個Whatisthis?這是什么Fromme.我給你的Itsays"Thanksforlettingmesleepinyourbedlastnight."上面寫道謝謝昨晚讓我睡你的床Iprefermyusualcashonthebedsidetable.在我床頭柜上留點錢我會更喜歡WhenIwenttothecutecoffeeplace,我在那家可愛的咖啡店時Ispoketothecountergirl,Nabulangi--我跟柜臺的女孩娜不浪雞聊了會兒IfsomeonenamedNabulangiismakinganappearance聽以名叫娜不浪雞的人開場的事情inthefirstsentence,Ihavetositdown.請容我坐好再聽Andshesaidhermanager'llbeinat11:00.她說她的經(jīng)理十一點會來店里SoIthoughtI'dchanelitup,所以我想我得換上香奈兒walkonoverthere,然后美美地走到那兒introducemyselfandyourfabulouscupcakes.介紹自己和你美味的小蛋糕That'sexactlywhatIwasgonnado.我"真"的有打算這么做呢I'mjustgonnagosaygood-byetoChestnutandgetgoing.我去跟栗寶道個別就走Youknow,havingonlyonecuteoutfit跟你說哦只有一件見得人的衣服takeshoursoffgettingdressed.省了好幾個小時的挑衣時間呢Oh.ThatisalotoffreshBrooklyn.哇外面好多新出爐的"布魯克林"Morning,Chestnut.早安栗寶It'sabeautiful--今天真是美好的...No.Way.不會吧Look,ChanelNumberTwo.哇屎奈兒Tellmeit'smud.告訴我這是泥T-tellmeit'smud.快告訴我這是泥It'smud?不是屎嗎Whatisthat?這是什么Acarrot?胡蘿卜嗎There'scarrotsinthemud?泥里怎么會有胡蘿卜There'snowater.沒水Oh,getitoffme,please.幫我弄掉拜托Pleasedosomething.幫幫我Justgetitoffme,getitoffme.快幫我弄掉幫我弄干凈Stop!住手Thisisdry-cleanonly.這衣服只能干洗Max,please,pleasetakemesomewheretheyhaveahotshower,麥克斯拜托帶我去洗個熱水澡吧Ibegofyou.我求您了Calmdown,it'sjustmud.冷靜不過是泥而已Max,please--麥克斯求你了Don'ttouchme!別碰我Thankyousomuchfortakingmetoshower你帶我來你兼職的地方洗澡atyourbabysittingjob.我感激不盡Well,Ididn'thavemuchofachoice.我也是被逼無奈Youpulledthepillowknifeonme.你都拿枕頭刀來威脅我了I'lljustintroducemyselftoyourboss我會向主人介紹自己andtellherwhathappened.并說明情況Look,Idon'twantPeachtoknowyouwerehere.我不想讓琵琪知道我?guī)氵^來Thisisajob.Notameet-and-greet.這是工作不是什么見面會Gotit.明白Yougetinthere,youtakeafive-minuteshower,我?guī)氵M去給你五分鐘時間洗澡cleanitupandgo.整理干凈就馬上走人Fine,I'llhideinthehallwaytillshe'sgone.好我先躲走廊等她走了再進去Noneed,justfollowmein.沒必要跟著我進來就行Sheneverreallylooksatme.她從來不正眼看我Morning!早安Hi,Max.早啊麥克斯Go!快去Hey,Peach.琵琪Uh,hairandmakeup.梳妝打扮What'sthebigoccasion?要出席什么場合嗎Pilates.去練普拉提Max,goodnews.麥克斯好消息Theyfoundawaytomakediamondsmoresparkly?人們發(fā)明了能讓鉆石更閃耀的方法嗎IgotBradandAngelinaaplaydate我?guī)筒既R德和安潔莉娜找到玩伴了withanothersetoftwinsinthebuilding.是樓里的另一對雙胞胎Itstartsinfiveminutes.五分鐘后見面Cool,whataretheirnames?不錯他們叫什么6B.六樓B座Bye-bye,Brangelina.再見布萊潔莉娜Mommylovesyou.媽咪愛你們Guys?Beforeyouleave,伙計們走之前stopatthisone.順便幫整整這個Angelinacouldusealittlehelp.幫安潔莉娜整一下Contourthatneck,she'safatty.拿粉修修脖子吧她太肥了Peach,comeon,that'sbabyfat.琵琪拜托嬰兒肥很正常吧Still,kidscanbecruel.可人家的孩子也是會以貌取人的呀Don'tyoulistentoyourmommy,Angelina.別聽你媽咪瞎說安潔莉娜Shenevereats.她自己老不吃東西Oh,no,shedoesn't.對啊她自己不吃東西Hereitis.做好了Carolinewithan"E."有"王"字旁的卡洛"琳"Ihaveyournewandcorrectnametag.我?guī)湍阒匦伦隽艘粋€正確的名牌Oh,thankyou,Han.謝謝你憨I'veseensomethingIshouldnothave.哎呀看到了不該看的東西Iwilljustputcorrectnametaghereoncounter.我把正確的名牌放在柜臺了Sosorry,butmanythankyous.對不起但是謝謝你的"美好"Whatareyoudoing?你這是在干嘛Iknowyousaidyoudon'twantitupthere.我知道你不想被寫上去Butnowthatyouseeit...但現(xiàn)在親眼看見成品了Howdoesitfeel?感覺如何Itfeelslikeyou'renotlisteningtome感覺就是你不聽話atthisjoboratmyotherjob.去哪都不聽我話Isaidafive-minuteshowerandgetout.我說給你五分鐘洗完就快閃DidyoutakeanapatPeach's?你還在琵琪家睡了一覺Thethreadcountwascallingtome.是高檔柔軟的寢具勾引我Peachfoundblondehairsinherbed琵琪在她床上發(fā)現(xiàn)金發(fā)andthoughtherhusbandwascheatingonher.還以為她丈夫搞外遇呢Whichheis,butthat'snotthepoint.他是有亂搞沒錯但這不重要Youalmostruinedaperfectlyhappyfakemarriage,你差點毀了人家貌合神離的婚姻andthereareinnocentchildreninvolved.而且還可能導致無辜孩子受罪Well,Ihavesomegoodnews.我有個好消息Look,it'sNabulangi.瞧那是娜不浪雞Iinvitedherintotasteyouramazingcupcakes.我邀她來品嘗你美味的小蛋糕Andwhenshelovesthem,we'llhaveaninatherbakery.只要她喜歡我們就能進駐她的面包房了-Comeoverandsayhello.-No,Ican'tnow.-過去跟她打聲招呼吧-不行我現(xiàn)在沒空IwannacallRobbiebeforewegettoobusy.我要在忙得抽不開身前打電話給羅比Tellhimwhentocomeoverandgethisstuff.告訴他什么時候過來拿東西Max,wait.麥克斯等等No,don'tdistractme.別別打擾我Iwannasoundcoolandhotandalllike,我想讓聲音聽起來冷酷又性感"Youcan'thavemeanymore,sucka.""以后姐的身心你都得不到啦蠢蛋"Max--麥克斯Robbie,it'sme.羅比是我Classyburponyouroutgoingmessage.錄留言信息還打嗝就你這么惡心Max,I--麥克斯我No.別吵Ineedyoutocomegetyourstufftomorrow.我想你明天過來拿東西Idon'tknowhowyou'vebeensurviving少了單杠和香體噴霧的日子withoutyourchin-upbarandAxebodyspray.想必是度日如年吧Max,hangup.麥克斯掛了吧Ialreadycalledhim.我打給他過了YoucalledRobbie?你打給羅比了啊You'vedonesomuchforme.你為我做了這么多Iwantedtodosomethingforyou,too.我也想幫你做點事SoIcalledRobbieandIhadhimcomeover,所以我打電話給羅比讓他過來andIgavehimhisstuff.把東西都還給他了Nowyouwon'thavetogothroughwithallthatmess.這樣省得再勾起你的傷心事AndIthinkyou'dbepleased,Ireallylethimhaveit.而且我還幫你教訓了他一頓開心吧Whatiswithyouandboundaries?你搞毛啊說好的界限呢You'reinmybed,you'reinmyboss'bed,你不但擠上我的床還睡了我老板的床andnowyougoandcallRobbie?現(xiàn)在你又擅自打電話給羅比You'relike--you'relikeyourbig-asshorse.你就像你就像你那頭大屁股的馬一樣Chargingineverywhereyoudon'tbelong.在別人的地盤肆意妄為IthoughtIwasdoingyouafavor.我以為是在幫你個忙嘛InspiteofwhatyousayaboutthesoundsIheard那晚從你臥室傳出的聲音comingfromyourbedroomtheothernight,盡管你不愿意承認Iknowyou'reupset.我還是知道你很難過Iwasmasturbating.姐當時在自慰Ilovemyjob.我愛死我的工作了Ineedtoseeyououtside.Now.我們出去談快Don'tgetinvolvedwithher.不要跟她扯上關系Shetakesmoneyfromthehomeless.她連流浪漢的錢都拿Nottrue,Bob'saninvestor.不是這樣的鮑勃是投資者Berightback.馬上回來Goodcupcake,right?小蛋糕不錯對吧Max,Idon'tknowhowsmartthatwas,麥克斯有理智的人是絕對不會blowingbyouronlypotentialbusinesscontact.把我們唯一的潛在商業(yè)伙伴嚇走Youstolemybreakupscene.你把我的分手場景偷走了Theonlyremotelygoodthingaboutbreakingupwithaguy跟男人分手僅有的樂趣就是istellinghimhowmuchbetteryouarethanhim在還他東西的時候告訴他whenyougivehimbackhisstuff.自己比他好個上千萬倍Idon'tknowifyounoticed,我不知道你有沒有注意到butmyentertainmentbudgetisprettylow我的娛樂預算超級有限andIwasreallylookingforwardtothat.所以我可是相當期待這一幕Andthenyouwentandstoleit.結果半路殺出個卡洛琳ButIguessyoucouldn'thelpit,但我猜你是情不自禁'causethat'swhatyouchanningsdo,youstealthings.你們錢寧家都是一路貨色偷東西的慣犯Interesting.有意思Okay,youwantedabreakupscene?好吧你這么想要分手場景You'reinone.我現(xiàn)在還一個給你I'mbreakingupwithyou.我要跟你分手Oh,okay.好啊Thecupcakebusinessisover,thedreamisdead.蛋糕事業(yè)終止夢想已死Oh,I'msureNabulangiwillbedevastated.我肯定娜不浪雞會很震驚的Idon'tneedyouoryourcupcakestosurvive.我不需要靠你或你的蛋糕來生存I'llfiguresomethingelseout.我會找到別的出路的Because,asidefromyourconstantWhartonputdowns,因為除了老被你瞧不起的沃頓學位I'mabusinessgenius我還是個商業(yè)天才andIwillalwayslandonmyfeet.我一定會逢兇化吉的Oh,really?真的嗎'Causetodayyoukindoflandedonyourfront.今早你還豐胸化屎呢We'redone.我們玩完了Afterworktonight,I'llgetmythingsandbegone.今晚工作結束后我會打包走人的Ooh,yougonnaloadupyourdream-filledwheeliebag你要拖著你滿載夢想的小拖輪箱andrideawayonSirmuds-a-lot?騎著屎粑粑爵士離開了嗎Goahead.Beasnegativeasyouwant.盡管嘲笑我吧想多消極就多消極'Causeyou'reinchargeofyourownfutureagain.你的未來你自己看著辦吧Oh,joke'sonyou.Idon'thaveafuture.白癡我窮得沒未來Max...麥克斯Areyouup?你醒著嗎No.不Max,areyoumad?麥克斯你生氣啦Yes.是Areyouupandmad?你醒著生氣呢Noandyes.不是Oh,yourbed'ssosoft.你的床好軟啊That'smyboob.那是我的胸IknowImovedout,butIcameback.我是搬走了但我又回來了Itooktherestofourdeaddreammoney我把咱們死去夢想的余錢拿走了andboughtsomecocktailsformyselfandsomepeople.然后買了幾杯雞尾酒給自己和其他人Andmyself.和自己Didyoubringmebackanyofthose?那你有外帶給我嗎'CauseIcan'tlistentothissober.不先喝醉我聽不下你念叨Max...麥克斯Ihavenothing.我一無所有Ireallynee